I wake up in the morning after having done the Night of Mayhem. There was still somewhat of a buzz after what I had achieved the night before. I get a message from Daryl "Daygame?" I had all this momentum over the last few weeks. Who was I to say no?
On the way to the city I spot a gorgeous brunette sitting a few seats in front of me. Already I am running a massive dialogue of self talk with reasons to talk/not talk to her. We arrive at Flinders St and I follow her off the train. She's walking too damn fast. I continue following her hoping she slows down but I can't get myself to talk to her :(
I walk towards Bourke St mall and I spot an artsy blonde walk past me. Boom! I turn around and walk after her. As soon as I turn around she's on her phone. Damn! I do a couple of laps of Bourke St mall thinking to myself "C'mon I just did the night of mayhem. I can do this!" My luck didn't turn around until Daryl arrived. I must admit I haven't been doing many approaches on my own in recent times. I need to spend more time approaching on my own.
We're walking towards the GPO when I spot a cute blonde dressed in all black. As I walk closer I spot something even better, another blonde but in a wintery outfit. I open direct and she's very receptive but the interaction seems to be going nowhere. I go for a number close but she's not interested so I eject. I probably should have hung around more which I haven't been doing much of. At the night of mayhem we went over objection handling. Something I need to work on over the next few weeks.
We decide to head off to Melb Central to see what's there. Daryl and I go up the escalators and I spot a beautiful brunette in a black skirt and this floral black top going down the escalators. I get to the top turn around and chase after her. I open direct. While she was quite receptive at first she was eager to get rid of me. I went for the number close anyway but a big NO!
We head back to Bourke St mall as there was not much going on at Melb Central. On our way I spot a hot blonde walking through the crowd. I sift through the crowd and catch up with her and open direct. She was very open and we had a great vibe going on. I go for the number close but she says she has a boyfriend. Objection handling. Need to practice.
We walk down Swanston St to check out Fed Square. Not much goes on there during the winter but today they had some kind of cultural thing happening so there was heaps of people there. Daryl and I are at the traffic lights and I spot a tall brunette in a white coat and white boots. She's with a friend. An Asian girl. I wait till she crosses the road and I run after her. I open direct again and she opens up but there is a language barrier. Daryl comes in to wing me but their lack of English isn't helping us get anywhere. They're air hostesses and they're only here for stop over. I run out of things to say so I eject.
Daryl and I walk back towards the crossing and on our way to Fed Square. This time I see a hot blonde across the road in a leather jacket and skirt. Again I wait for her to cross the road and I run after her. I open direct. She is very responsive but she says she has to go. I go for the number close and she kindly agrees. Too fast I reckon to really take it somewhere.
It's getting dark and Daryl needs to head back to his hostel. I get a call from Rey who did the night of mayhem as well and he had just finished approach energy. I meet up with Rey and Alex on Swanston St. Both are approach machines. I have to say I am blown away by Rey's progress in the last month. Going from not being able to ask a girl for the time a few weeks ago to becoming a approach machine really is inspiring.
I walk past a cute blonde. She looks abit young but I go anyway. We talk for abit. Throw a few teases and cold reads and she seems to be responding well. I go for a number close but I get the boyfriend again. Objection handling!
Alex calls it a day leaving myself and Rey to cause some damage. We decide to head to crown. I spot a blonde as we were walking up. She looks great from behind but once I saw her face I was like "whoops!" but I kept rolling with it. She seems really cool but I want to head to crown. I go for the number close but I get the boyfriend again.
We're strolling around the casino floor and I spot 2 blondes walking together. I walk to the less cute of the two and say "I need to talk to your friend bacause I think she's really beautiful." She's really cool with it and leaves to let me talk to my target. I throw a few teases and she's responding well but I couldn't keep things going. Number close, boyfriend, BOOM!
Being inspired by the night of mayhem, Rey and I decide to marry someone. I spot 3 girls. A blonde, a brunette and an Asian. Rey and I agree to do this together. As I'm running down the stairs Rey backs off so it left me to chase after them. I walk up to them and say "hey guys I want to marry all of you" I get a laugh from them and they walk off. Rey managed to redeem himself later on. Before I went home.
Objection handling is a big thing for me at the moment as well as hanging in there once I'm in. With abit of momentum under my belt I'm ready to take things another step further. By doing the night of mayhem I got the taste of what it's like to really get blown out and it's really not that bad.
Until next time...
We're
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
5 things I am greatful for 29/06/2010
1. A warm bed to sleep in
2. Money to survive
3. Freedom to express myself
4. Warm long coats
5. Meditation
2. Money to survive
3. Freedom to express myself
4. Warm long coats
5. Meditation
Monday, June 28, 2010
5 Things I am greatful for 29/06/2010
1. Sexy women
2. Money to survive
3. Friends who I can rely on
4. Food
5. Health and fitness
2. Money to survive
3. Friends who I can rely on
4. Food
5. Health and fitness
Understanding why I don't have women now
When I got into pickup about a year ago I had 0 women in my life. The only women I ever talked to were either my sisters, my mum or workmates. Fast forward a year and still there are 0 women in my life. I am definitely meeting more women and having amazing experiences with them but no-one who play a big part in my life.
I think the major reason why I haven't got many women in my life is reference experiences. I haven't put myself in situations where I can really get to know women. Growing up I grew up with 4 strong minded, confident and ambitious women. I grew up drifting in the shadows. I had no male influence or role model to demonstrate what it was to be a man. I what I learned about women I learned from my sisters. I grew up thinking sex was bad and women didn't like sex. I grew up with guilt behind wanting amazing sexual experiences with women.
To make things worse, I went to an all-boys school so throughout my teenage years, my contact with women apart from my mother and my sisters was 0. I was shy, withdrawn and abit of a social retard. I was bullied and I would avoid any social activities at all costs so I missed an integral part of my adolescence which was learning social skills to interact with people.
This has carried on until I joined the pick-up community last year. At the time I was desperate. I had only been with 3 women in my entire life and it was over 2 years since I had been with a girl. Something had to be done. I had discovered "The Game" 3 years earlier but I had alot of image issues I had to deal with. I wore braces, thick glasses and a bowl haircut done by my mum. There was a massive backlash from my parents as a result in wanting to change my image but I knew it had to be done. Even today my parents have a go at me for how I look. They think I'm some kind of criminal.
For most of my life I haven't had the balls to talk to girls. I decided to bite the bullet and fork out some cash for a bootcamp. I needed to put myself in a situation where I had no choice but to talk to girls. As a result of ongoing coaching I have become comfortable in approaching women but they don't seem to be going anywhere and I feel it all comes back to reference experiences.
There comes a point in an interaction with a woman where I am in isolation with them and I am not spending enough time in these situations. In the last month I can say I've only been in about 2 hours in isolation which is simply not enough. To get better with women you need to spend time with women. Funny how we join the pick-up community to meet more women but instead we end up meeting more guys.
I went to speed dating last weekend which was awesome. It got me in an isolated situation where I was able to build reference experiences which in turn will make me better with women. I managed to score a date with 4 out of the 10 girls from speed dating which means more reference experiences. I'm looking forward to doing speed dating more often. With my ever improving conversational and flirting skills they should ban me because it's almost cheating :)
In recent times I have been beating myself up for not progressing as fast as I would like with women. I have to realise that I am trying to catch up on 25 years of reference experiences in the space of a year which is a tough thing to do. I accept that I am on a journey and that the process will take as long as it takes. I am becoming smarter about how I meet women and building reference experiences. I am starting to feel juiced about meeting women again and I feel that something awesome is on the horizon.
I think the major reason why I haven't got many women in my life is reference experiences. I haven't put myself in situations where I can really get to know women. Growing up I grew up with 4 strong minded, confident and ambitious women. I grew up drifting in the shadows. I had no male influence or role model to demonstrate what it was to be a man. I what I learned about women I learned from my sisters. I grew up thinking sex was bad and women didn't like sex. I grew up with guilt behind wanting amazing sexual experiences with women.
To make things worse, I went to an all-boys school so throughout my teenage years, my contact with women apart from my mother and my sisters was 0. I was shy, withdrawn and abit of a social retard. I was bullied and I would avoid any social activities at all costs so I missed an integral part of my adolescence which was learning social skills to interact with people.
This has carried on until I joined the pick-up community last year. At the time I was desperate. I had only been with 3 women in my entire life and it was over 2 years since I had been with a girl. Something had to be done. I had discovered "The Game" 3 years earlier but I had alot of image issues I had to deal with. I wore braces, thick glasses and a bowl haircut done by my mum. There was a massive backlash from my parents as a result in wanting to change my image but I knew it had to be done. Even today my parents have a go at me for how I look. They think I'm some kind of criminal.
For most of my life I haven't had the balls to talk to girls. I decided to bite the bullet and fork out some cash for a bootcamp. I needed to put myself in a situation where I had no choice but to talk to girls. As a result of ongoing coaching I have become comfortable in approaching women but they don't seem to be going anywhere and I feel it all comes back to reference experiences.
There comes a point in an interaction with a woman where I am in isolation with them and I am not spending enough time in these situations. In the last month I can say I've only been in about 2 hours in isolation which is simply not enough. To get better with women you need to spend time with women. Funny how we join the pick-up community to meet more women but instead we end up meeting more guys.
I went to speed dating last weekend which was awesome. It got me in an isolated situation where I was able to build reference experiences which in turn will make me better with women. I managed to score a date with 4 out of the 10 girls from speed dating which means more reference experiences. I'm looking forward to doing speed dating more often. With my ever improving conversational and flirting skills they should ban me because it's almost cheating :)
In recent times I have been beating myself up for not progressing as fast as I would like with women. I have to realise that I am trying to catch up on 25 years of reference experiences in the space of a year which is a tough thing to do. I accept that I am on a journey and that the process will take as long as it takes. I am becoming smarter about how I meet women and building reference experiences. I am starting to feel juiced about meeting women again and I feel that something awesome is on the horizon.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Nightgame
25/06/2010
As mentioned in my last post I didn't realise how hard it is to post a field report for night game. So many things are going on. There are so many interactions I get into and forget quickly. I'll do my best to breakdown most of my interactions.
Carrying over from the night before I was in a sexual state. Throughout the day I had visions of pulling girls out of Spice Market and bringing them to the toilets in the lobby and having dirty animal sex. I had invited a few guys from the Lair and All Stars. I only got a reply from Daryl and Adam from All Stars. We decided to meet at Fed Square with the Wing Knights crew. I arrived early and met up with Carl and Eddie. We all head to Spice Market.
As soon as I walk in I head straight to the bar. While I'm waiting I open the girl next to me. I opened with something situational about the bar. She was abit old but it was good to get in a social mood. We were chatting for quite abit and got a friendly vibe going. As we're talking a guy from behind comes over and asks me what I do for a living. He then goes on to talk about how he works for NASA and goes on and on in a bragging sort of way. Adam is talking to the group right behind me. Turns out they're friends with the girl I'm talking to at the bar. So NASA guy keeps going on and on to the point the girl leaves him to me to deal with.
I get my drink and join Adam. "Hey my friend isn't causing you any trouble is he?" Adam introduces me to the group. There are a couple of cuites. One in particular, I figure Adam is going for her. We'll call her J. J comments on my scarfe and touches it. I tease her and we exchange some banter but knowing she's Adam's I i turn over to talk to the friends. They seem real cool and we're vibing well. Then NASA guy decides to join us. He starts talking to one of the girls and starts rambling on about NASA. You can see she doesn't give a shit and she's getting real pissed off. This guy just doesn't have a clue. I'm standing there enjoying the events unfolding. NASA guy is pretty much told to fuck off. Adam and I chat to the girls for abit longer before ejecting. Adam probably should have at least number closed J.
Adam and I join the rest of the guys. They argue that there are too many oldies in the bar so they leave and head to Cookie. Adam and I decide to stick around for abit longer before heading to Cookie. There's not much going on so Adam and I decide to do a lap around the venue before leaving. I manage to catch a few approach invitations where I went in and danced with the girls of a bit but they kinda went nowhere. I've done my lap around the venue and I see Adam in set. I spot another set not far away from where he is so I go over and talk to them.
I walk over and there are two cuties. A petite black haired girl and a brown haired Dutch girl. I saw the petite black haired girl dancing at the bar earlier thinking "slut!" I go in and chat to both. The Dutch girl is incredibly sexy wearing this sequin black dress. She seems like she's up for some fun too. We're exchanging abit of banter and flirting abit. Petite black haired girl walks off so I have the Dutch girl in isolation. There seems to be a great vibe going between us and then she just throws out that she's married out there.
Me: Cool. Do you want another one?
We chat for abit more. I can't see her friend. I number close Dutch girl and leave.
I texted her not long after:
Me: Pleasure meeting you :) Khoi
Next Day:
Me: Are you keeping out of trouble
Her: ?
Me: ???
Her: Sorry who's this?
Me: Ask your friend. Unlike you she doesn't have the memory of a goldfish
Her: That's rude dexter wannabe (we were talking about serial killers and dexter)
Me: Dexter is based on my life story. It's a shame you haven't seen the second season. It's when it gets better.
Yet to hear anything. I possibly could have hung around and switched targets. Based on my last post my slut radar may be my married woman radar.
Adam and I head to Cookie. We can't find the rest of the guys. There's not much going on so we leave and check out Long Room. Again not much going on. I do a lap around the bar. As I am walking I see a group of blondes dancing. As I walk closer and I lock eyes with one of them, a gorgeous curvaceous blonde. I had a hard time getting my eyes off her rack. I pull her in.
Me: You guys are the only ones having fun here tonight
Her: Why don't you join us?
I introduce myself to her friends and dance with blondie. I bring her in real close and we're humping and grinding each other. She's giving me a massive hard-on. We're real close and our eyes are locked. I can feel the sexual charge and I know she feels it too. I know it's on but I am hesitant to make a move. Fuck!
I walk away kicking myself. Adam is telling me she's up for it and to go for it. I turn back to her and dance with her again. By that point she could see what I was after. My eyes said it all. She goes on to say she has boyfriend or she's married. I can't remember now. It always seems like the hotter the girl is the more hesitant I am to make a move.
Adam is in a set and I'm standing in the bar with a massive boner. Grrr. Adam ejects and seeing as there was nothing else in the bar we left. I get a call from Daryl and we to meet on Swanston St. Adam and I arrive. While we were waiting I spot a sexy brunette at the tram stop. I walk over and open direct. She was very open and we vibed well. Turns out she's some kind of musical actress (I haven't got around to facebook stalking her yet). Her tram is coming so I get the number close.
We meet up with the rest of the guys trying to determine where we should go next. Adam and I are keen on Spice Market while the others want to head somewhere else. We split up and head to Spice Market. At this point there wasn't really much going on. I would walk through the crowd and jump in on approach invitations but they didn't really go anywhere. Adam and I finish the night at Transport with a few chillout drinks before heading home.
Night of Mayhem
I really didn't know what to expect from this but from the stories I've heard I was looking forward to this. I meet up at Fed Square with Damo, Keith, Rey and Michael. Liam rocks up abit late and we head to transport to have abit of a chat about social freedom. It's weird I think most of us know the principles and concepts behind social freedom, not many of us practice it.
We then hit the streets for abit of mischief. We start off by proposing to random girls on the street. The girl I proposed to seemed to respond well but I didn't roll with it and try to take it further. Something I haven't been doing enough.
Next thing Liam got me doing was getting on a bench and doing the Karate Crane thingy for 20 seconds. It's funny as I was doing it. Though I did get looks, people would just turn away and get on with what they were doing. We continued on walking on the street and opened as many girls as we could with the intention of closing. A number of times I would leave set and Liam would ask "Did you close her?" I'd be like "Ummm...No" and Liam would say "Well, get back in there." They wouldn't give me their numbers but it put me in the mentality to go for the close.
There was one girl who passed us who was holding an umbrella and there was a guy walking near her but we weren't sure if they were together. Liam gets me to open. I run after her and open. Next thing the guy pushes me from behind and gets confrontational. He say "What are you doing? You don't just come up to girls and talk to them." I stood there staring him in the eye unfazed by his agression. I say "hey you're a lucky guy." He's getting more agressive and seems to ready to throw hands but I stand my ground and stare him in the eye. He says "you're lucky I've got a birthday party to goto". He turns away for a second and turns back winding up his fists expecting me to flinch but I still hold my ground. I simply smile and watch as he walks away. Second time someone has been confrontational with me this week. It's weird I don't know if I'm keeping still out of sheer stupidity or if it's me really standing my ground. I found it kinda funny "You don't just come up to girls and talk to them."
Liam then gets us having a conversation with one person on the footpath on one side of the road and another person on the otherside. I was blown away by my vocal projection. Something I have worked on for the last few months.
Now it was time to put what we have practiced into the club. We went to Cookie and we focused on being in a meditative state in times when we're not in set. Alot of the times we feel the need to be approaching to maintain our social value which alot of the time makes us more nervous. I have a feel for where Liam is getting at with this but I'm not good at explaining it. Liam gets me to open a set but focusing more on talking slower, getting closer and using alot of sexual touch. Something I'm still trying to get good at. I still feel the need to be high energy sometimes.
After a few sets we head upstairs to the Toff. This time we're going for quick makeouts. Liam points out a set for me to enter. I feel abit hesitant but I go in. I open direct, talking in slow-mo and holding eye contact. I go for the kiss but she backs off. BOOM! I get blown out. Liam and Damo point out sets, I go in, go for the makeout and BOOM!. It's funny even though I got blownout, I don't feel any different. There were a couple of sets where even after I attempted to kiss them, they still felt comfortable with me around. Even though I didn't get a kiss close it put me in the mindset of becoming a closer. Something I have been struggling with for a while.
We ended the night with the right of passage, dancing in front of transport. As we were dancing, people inside were cheering us on. It was awesome as at this point we didn't really care what people thought. I came out of this feeling like I can become the guy who closes. To be more comfortable in talking slower and leaving space. It also opened me to becoming more of an objection handler.
As mentioned in my last post I didn't realise how hard it is to post a field report for night game. So many things are going on. There are so many interactions I get into and forget quickly. I'll do my best to breakdown most of my interactions.
Carrying over from the night before I was in a sexual state. Throughout the day I had visions of pulling girls out of Spice Market and bringing them to the toilets in the lobby and having dirty animal sex. I had invited a few guys from the Lair and All Stars. I only got a reply from Daryl and Adam from All Stars. We decided to meet at Fed Square with the Wing Knights crew. I arrived early and met up with Carl and Eddie. We all head to Spice Market.
As soon as I walk in I head straight to the bar. While I'm waiting I open the girl next to me. I opened with something situational about the bar. She was abit old but it was good to get in a social mood. We were chatting for quite abit and got a friendly vibe going. As we're talking a guy from behind comes over and asks me what I do for a living. He then goes on to talk about how he works for NASA and goes on and on in a bragging sort of way. Adam is talking to the group right behind me. Turns out they're friends with the girl I'm talking to at the bar. So NASA guy keeps going on and on to the point the girl leaves him to me to deal with.
I get my drink and join Adam. "Hey my friend isn't causing you any trouble is he?" Adam introduces me to the group. There are a couple of cuites. One in particular, I figure Adam is going for her. We'll call her J. J comments on my scarfe and touches it. I tease her and we exchange some banter but knowing she's Adam's I i turn over to talk to the friends. They seem real cool and we're vibing well. Then NASA guy decides to join us. He starts talking to one of the girls and starts rambling on about NASA. You can see she doesn't give a shit and she's getting real pissed off. This guy just doesn't have a clue. I'm standing there enjoying the events unfolding. NASA guy is pretty much told to fuck off. Adam and I chat to the girls for abit longer before ejecting. Adam probably should have at least number closed J.
Adam and I join the rest of the guys. They argue that there are too many oldies in the bar so they leave and head to Cookie. Adam and I decide to stick around for abit longer before heading to Cookie. There's not much going on so Adam and I decide to do a lap around the venue before leaving. I manage to catch a few approach invitations where I went in and danced with the girls of a bit but they kinda went nowhere. I've done my lap around the venue and I see Adam in set. I spot another set not far away from where he is so I go over and talk to them.
I walk over and there are two cuties. A petite black haired girl and a brown haired Dutch girl. I saw the petite black haired girl dancing at the bar earlier thinking "slut!" I go in and chat to both. The Dutch girl is incredibly sexy wearing this sequin black dress. She seems like she's up for some fun too. We're exchanging abit of banter and flirting abit. Petite black haired girl walks off so I have the Dutch girl in isolation. There seems to be a great vibe going between us and then she just throws out that she's married out there.
Me: Cool. Do you want another one?
We chat for abit more. I can't see her friend. I number close Dutch girl and leave.
I texted her not long after:
Me: Pleasure meeting you :) Khoi
Next Day:
Me: Are you keeping out of trouble
Her: ?
Me: ???
Her: Sorry who's this?
Me: Ask your friend. Unlike you she doesn't have the memory of a goldfish
Her: That's rude dexter wannabe (we were talking about serial killers and dexter)
Me: Dexter is based on my life story. It's a shame you haven't seen the second season. It's when it gets better.
Yet to hear anything. I possibly could have hung around and switched targets. Based on my last post my slut radar may be my married woman radar.
Adam and I head to Cookie. We can't find the rest of the guys. There's not much going on so we leave and check out Long Room. Again not much going on. I do a lap around the bar. As I am walking I see a group of blondes dancing. As I walk closer and I lock eyes with one of them, a gorgeous curvaceous blonde. I had a hard time getting my eyes off her rack. I pull her in.
Me: You guys are the only ones having fun here tonight
Her: Why don't you join us?
I introduce myself to her friends and dance with blondie. I bring her in real close and we're humping and grinding each other. She's giving me a massive hard-on. We're real close and our eyes are locked. I can feel the sexual charge and I know she feels it too. I know it's on but I am hesitant to make a move. Fuck!
I walk away kicking myself. Adam is telling me she's up for it and to go for it. I turn back to her and dance with her again. By that point she could see what I was after. My eyes said it all. She goes on to say she has boyfriend or she's married. I can't remember now. It always seems like the hotter the girl is the more hesitant I am to make a move.
Adam is in a set and I'm standing in the bar with a massive boner. Grrr. Adam ejects and seeing as there was nothing else in the bar we left. I get a call from Daryl and we to meet on Swanston St. Adam and I arrive. While we were waiting I spot a sexy brunette at the tram stop. I walk over and open direct. She was very open and we vibed well. Turns out she's some kind of musical actress (I haven't got around to facebook stalking her yet). Her tram is coming so I get the number close.
We meet up with the rest of the guys trying to determine where we should go next. Adam and I are keen on Spice Market while the others want to head somewhere else. We split up and head to Spice Market. At this point there wasn't really much going on. I would walk through the crowd and jump in on approach invitations but they didn't really go anywhere. Adam and I finish the night at Transport with a few chillout drinks before heading home.
Night of Mayhem
I really didn't know what to expect from this but from the stories I've heard I was looking forward to this. I meet up at Fed Square with Damo, Keith, Rey and Michael. Liam rocks up abit late and we head to transport to have abit of a chat about social freedom. It's weird I think most of us know the principles and concepts behind social freedom, not many of us practice it.
We then hit the streets for abit of mischief. We start off by proposing to random girls on the street. The girl I proposed to seemed to respond well but I didn't roll with it and try to take it further. Something I haven't been doing enough.
Next thing Liam got me doing was getting on a bench and doing the Karate Crane thingy for 20 seconds. It's funny as I was doing it. Though I did get looks, people would just turn away and get on with what they were doing. We continued on walking on the street and opened as many girls as we could with the intention of closing. A number of times I would leave set and Liam would ask "Did you close her?" I'd be like "Ummm...No" and Liam would say "Well, get back in there." They wouldn't give me their numbers but it put me in the mentality to go for the close.
There was one girl who passed us who was holding an umbrella and there was a guy walking near her but we weren't sure if they were together. Liam gets me to open. I run after her and open. Next thing the guy pushes me from behind and gets confrontational. He say "What are you doing? You don't just come up to girls and talk to them." I stood there staring him in the eye unfazed by his agression. I say "hey you're a lucky guy." He's getting more agressive and seems to ready to throw hands but I stand my ground and stare him in the eye. He says "you're lucky I've got a birthday party to goto". He turns away for a second and turns back winding up his fists expecting me to flinch but I still hold my ground. I simply smile and watch as he walks away. Second time someone has been confrontational with me this week. It's weird I don't know if I'm keeping still out of sheer stupidity or if it's me really standing my ground. I found it kinda funny "You don't just come up to girls and talk to them."
Liam then gets us having a conversation with one person on the footpath on one side of the road and another person on the otherside. I was blown away by my vocal projection. Something I have worked on for the last few months.
Now it was time to put what we have practiced into the club. We went to Cookie and we focused on being in a meditative state in times when we're not in set. Alot of the times we feel the need to be approaching to maintain our social value which alot of the time makes us more nervous. I have a feel for where Liam is getting at with this but I'm not good at explaining it. Liam gets me to open a set but focusing more on talking slower, getting closer and using alot of sexual touch. Something I'm still trying to get good at. I still feel the need to be high energy sometimes.
After a few sets we head upstairs to the Toff. This time we're going for quick makeouts. Liam points out a set for me to enter. I feel abit hesitant but I go in. I open direct, talking in slow-mo and holding eye contact. I go for the kiss but she backs off. BOOM! I get blown out. Liam and Damo point out sets, I go in, go for the makeout and BOOM!. It's funny even though I got blownout, I don't feel any different. There were a couple of sets where even after I attempted to kiss them, they still felt comfortable with me around. Even though I didn't get a kiss close it put me in the mindset of becoming a closer. Something I have been struggling with for a while.
We ended the night with the right of passage, dancing in front of transport. As we were dancing, people inside were cheering us on. It was awesome as at this point we didn't really care what people thought. I came out of this feeling like I can become the guy who closes. To be more comfortable in talking slower and leaving space. It also opened me to becoming more of an objection handler.
Personal Wins for the week 27/06/2010
Write down your wins, successes, blockbuster results, shifts, and miracles.
22/06/2010 Opened a girl on the train
Smashed a social barrier of mine
23/06/2010 Opened a girl sitting down
I don’t normally approach girls sitting down as I worry about running out of things to say
26/06/2010 Speed dating
Got me to spend time with beautiful women in isolation where I could build some reference experiences which I feel is now the major point stopping me from getting better with women.
26/06/2010 Night of Myahem
Got me to expand my comfort zone and be comfortable in getting blown out
22/06/2010 Opened a girl on the train
Smashed a social barrier of mine
23/06/2010 Opened a girl sitting down
I don’t normally approach girls sitting down as I worry about running out of things to say
26/06/2010 Speed dating
Got me to spend time with beautiful women in isolation where I could build some reference experiences which I feel is now the major point stopping me from getting better with women.
26/06/2010 Night of Myahem
Got me to expand my comfort zone and be comfortable in getting blown out
Weekly Update Sheet 26/06/2010
Why are you alive?
To inspire others to get the best out of themselves. To inspire myself to get the best out of myself. To bring value to everyone who comes into my presence.
What are you most proud of having accomplished this week?
Pushing my comfort zones. Doing things I have never done before.
What challenges did you encounter this week?
Finding the motivation to go to work. Keep momentum going with all stars. I think I may have burned myself out in that first week.
What did you most enjoy this week?
Speed dating. It was surprising how many hot girls there were and it was fun to work on my conversational skills.
Night of Mayhem with the Naturals. It really put me out of my comfort zone and opened my mind to the possibility of being a man women desire.
What would you like to talk about during your next coaching session?
Making things fun
Is there anything else you would like to let me know?
Looking forward to moving on and smashing my goals.
I didn't like the idea of the missions being spread out to two weeks. I feel like the excitement of smashing my goals kinda died out by the second week and the juice just wasn't there. On a more positive note. I went speed dating where there was surprisingly some really hot girls. I was good to get these girls in isolation as I feel in the last few weeks I haven't been putting myself in these situations. I look forward to doing more in the future.
I also did the Night of Mayhem workshop with the Naturals. A workshop focused on social freedom and expanding your comfort zone. The biggest thing I got out of this was that I can be the guy who pulls the trigger and to become a better objection handler.
To inspire others to get the best out of themselves. To inspire myself to get the best out of myself. To bring value to everyone who comes into my presence.
What are you most proud of having accomplished this week?
Pushing my comfort zones. Doing things I have never done before.
What challenges did you encounter this week?
Finding the motivation to go to work. Keep momentum going with all stars. I think I may have burned myself out in that first week.
What did you most enjoy this week?
Speed dating. It was surprising how many hot girls there were and it was fun to work on my conversational skills.
Night of Mayhem with the Naturals. It really put me out of my comfort zone and opened my mind to the possibility of being a man women desire.
What would you like to talk about during your next coaching session?
Making things fun
Is there anything else you would like to let me know?
Looking forward to moving on and smashing my goals.
I didn't like the idea of the missions being spread out to two weeks. I feel like the excitement of smashing my goals kinda died out by the second week and the juice just wasn't there. On a more positive note. I went speed dating where there was surprisingly some really hot girls. I was good to get these girls in isolation as I feel in the last few weeks I haven't been putting myself in these situations. I look forward to doing more in the future.
I also did the Night of Mayhem workshop with the Naturals. A workshop focused on social freedom and expanding your comfort zone. The biggest thing I got out of this was that I can be the guy who pulls the trigger and to become a better objection handler.
Saturday, June 26, 2010
5 Things I am greatful for 27/06/2010
1. To have the freedom to do whatever I want
2. To know my power comes from honesty which resides from the core
3. To feel inspired by others to become a better person
4. To feel young and healthy
5. To feel attractive
2. To know my power comes from honesty which resides from the core
3. To feel inspired by others to become a better person
4. To feel young and healthy
5. To feel attractive
Friday, June 25, 2010
Nightgame 24/06/2010
I haven't done much nightgame recently which is a shame because I feel I have alot more freedom in my interactions. I can be more fun, playful, flirty and sexual very fast. Thursday night Sammy picks me up from my place and we head the city to meet up with Daryl. Wet meet up at fed square we spot a tall gorgeous brunette walk past. I turn back and chase after her.
Me: Excuse me.
She freaks out for abit and I give her some time to relax and realise what's going on.
Me: I know this is totally out of the blue but...you're really beautiful I had to come talk to you. My name is Khoi
As I was saying that I was blown away by my vocal projection. I think Sammy and Daryl would have been able to hear the whole interaction. Thinking to myself "I'm fucking awesome." Generally I am a soft spoken person and I have been practicing developing more vocal range and power. It's really starting to pay off.
Her: Thankyou. I'm N
Me: So what trouble are you plotting tonight?
Her: I'm going to Run bar (??? I think thats what she said)
Me: I have no idea where that is.
Her: It's on Nicholson St
Me: I take it you're abit of a party girl.
Her: Yeah but I like to relax sometimes too
The interaction was kinda going nowhere so I go for the number close anyway.
Her: How old are you?
Me: I'm 26
Her: I'm 18
Damn! As this was happening I knew I played into her hoop. Oh well.
We end up going to Cookie to have a few drinks. There wasn't much around. As we were walking out we spot three hotties talking to the bouncer. They're from Perth and they're looking for a place to dance. Sammy opens them and they ask us where we recommend. I suggest Eve. We talk to the girls for abit but they seem to have ADD.
We decide to call it a night. We were saying farewell and I was doing some stupid karate chops. Some hobo guy comes in and jokes around with us for abit. I think nothing of it. Sammy and I say bye to Daryl. I'm really needing to take a piss so Sammy and I head to hungry jacks. As we're walking up there hobo guy comes up to me and starts asking for some change. I say I don't have any money on me. He keeps persisting and I continue to say I don't have any money.
I walk into hungry jacks and toward the toilets and he is still following me. I have a feeling something is about to go down. I stop at the door to goto the toilets and I look him in the eye and tell him look I don't have any money. He then asks me "are you a faggot?" to which I reply "do you really expect me to give you money after asking me if I'm a faggot?"
At that point he starts getting aggressive and starts closing the distance on me. I push him out of the way and tell him "get out of my space!" For some weird reason he pulls his hand out to shake my hand and I reply "I don't want to shake your hand" He gets even more agressive expecting me to back off or shy away but I hold my ground and stare straight in the eye. It was a weird moment. Even though there were these feelings of fear I also felt a sense of peace. He threw something at me expecting me to react but I was able to hold myself together.
At one point I must have said something to aggravate him so he says "what are you gonna do about it?" to which I reply "what are you gonna do about it?" He puts his hand in his pocket as if he's gonna grab a knife or something but at that point my will was stronger than his and he backed away. Ahhhh finally I can take a piss.
Anyway Sammy and I leave hungry jacks and drive home. As we're driving home I suggest we check out Lou Lou's seeing as it's on the way home. He agrees. We arrive at Lou Lou's but the line is bloody long and there is a cover charge. I manage to get the bouncer to get us guestlist but still couldn't be bothered paying. We head to the Irish pub across from Lou Lou's. They're playing some pub rock and it was full of bogans. Sammy seems abit weirded out and I'm thinking to myself fuck it I'll just roll with it.
I noticed a cute redhead in a purple dress dancing at the bar. You could see she was in a group but at the same time kinda disconnected from it. I was thinking "slut!" Anyway Sammy and I were watching the band and we start singing along to some bogan classics like Jessie's girl. I see the cute redhead walk onto the dancefloor. I stand there waiting for an opportunity to go in. As she dancing she is scanning around and I lock eyes with her and smile. I walk in, take her hand, spin her and draw her in close. I say in her ear "what's your name?" We exchange a few words for abit as I am drawing her closer and closer. I let her go off and dance for abit and I talk to her friends. Turns out the redhead was married. Damn!
One thing I have been struggling with when doing nightgame is getting in that sexual state. I feel that though it does not guarantee I will get lucky that night. It does put me in the game. Which brings me to Friday night. More to come...
Me: Excuse me.
She freaks out for abit and I give her some time to relax and realise what's going on.
Me: I know this is totally out of the blue but...you're really beautiful I had to come talk to you. My name is Khoi
As I was saying that I was blown away by my vocal projection. I think Sammy and Daryl would have been able to hear the whole interaction. Thinking to myself "I'm fucking awesome." Generally I am a soft spoken person and I have been practicing developing more vocal range and power. It's really starting to pay off.
Her: Thankyou. I'm N
Me: So what trouble are you plotting tonight?
Her: I'm going to Run bar (??? I think thats what she said)
Me: I have no idea where that is.
Her: It's on Nicholson St
Me: I take it you're abit of a party girl.
Her: Yeah but I like to relax sometimes too
The interaction was kinda going nowhere so I go for the number close anyway.
Her: How old are you?
Me: I'm 26
Her: I'm 18
Damn! As this was happening I knew I played into her hoop. Oh well.
We end up going to Cookie to have a few drinks. There wasn't much around. As we were walking out we spot three hotties talking to the bouncer. They're from Perth and they're looking for a place to dance. Sammy opens them and they ask us where we recommend. I suggest Eve. We talk to the girls for abit but they seem to have ADD.
We decide to call it a night. We were saying farewell and I was doing some stupid karate chops. Some hobo guy comes in and jokes around with us for abit. I think nothing of it. Sammy and I say bye to Daryl. I'm really needing to take a piss so Sammy and I head to hungry jacks. As we're walking up there hobo guy comes up to me and starts asking for some change. I say I don't have any money on me. He keeps persisting and I continue to say I don't have any money.
I walk into hungry jacks and toward the toilets and he is still following me. I have a feeling something is about to go down. I stop at the door to goto the toilets and I look him in the eye and tell him look I don't have any money. He then asks me "are you a faggot?" to which I reply "do you really expect me to give you money after asking me if I'm a faggot?"
At that point he starts getting aggressive and starts closing the distance on me. I push him out of the way and tell him "get out of my space!" For some weird reason he pulls his hand out to shake my hand and I reply "I don't want to shake your hand" He gets even more agressive expecting me to back off or shy away but I hold my ground and stare straight in the eye. It was a weird moment. Even though there were these feelings of fear I also felt a sense of peace. He threw something at me expecting me to react but I was able to hold myself together.
At one point I must have said something to aggravate him so he says "what are you gonna do about it?" to which I reply "what are you gonna do about it?" He puts his hand in his pocket as if he's gonna grab a knife or something but at that point my will was stronger than his and he backed away. Ahhhh finally I can take a piss.
Anyway Sammy and I leave hungry jacks and drive home. As we're driving home I suggest we check out Lou Lou's seeing as it's on the way home. He agrees. We arrive at Lou Lou's but the line is bloody long and there is a cover charge. I manage to get the bouncer to get us guestlist but still couldn't be bothered paying. We head to the Irish pub across from Lou Lou's. They're playing some pub rock and it was full of bogans. Sammy seems abit weirded out and I'm thinking to myself fuck it I'll just roll with it.
I noticed a cute redhead in a purple dress dancing at the bar. You could see she was in a group but at the same time kinda disconnected from it. I was thinking "slut!" Anyway Sammy and I were watching the band and we start singing along to some bogan classics like Jessie's girl. I see the cute redhead walk onto the dancefloor. I stand there waiting for an opportunity to go in. As she dancing she is scanning around and I lock eyes with her and smile. I walk in, take her hand, spin her and draw her in close. I say in her ear "what's your name?" We exchange a few words for abit as I am drawing her closer and closer. I let her go off and dance for abit and I talk to her friends. Turns out the redhead was married. Damn!
One thing I have been struggling with when doing nightgame is getting in that sexual state. I feel that though it does not guarantee I will get lucky that night. It does put me in the game. Which brings me to Friday night. More to come...
5 things I am greatful for
1. Freedom to express myself
2. Food
3. My health
4. Shelter
5. Support of incredible people
2. Food
3. My health
4. Shelter
5. Support of incredible people
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Daygame 24/06/2010: Melbourne CBD
I feel my approach trigger has been way off recently. I figure that's attributed to not keeping up the momentum while I had it. I have been feeling massive approach anxiety when I am out and it stifles me. I do manage to approach but the nerves when in set just get the better of me.
Today I was thinking about my approach trigger and tried to remember times when I had it and what I did. I think those times I was an approach machine I would let the feelings of anxiety brew across my whole body to the point where it just hurt too much that I had to approach. I kept that in mind for today.
I arrive in the city at around 1PM. I find the best time to do daygame in the city are at around 12ish when women are on their lunch breaks and about 5ish as they are going home. I'm walking around the city feeling massive approach anxiety. I've let alot of gorgeous women past me and there is all this bullshit going on in my head. For example, a cute girl would walk past me and I'd turn around to look at her and think "she's too far away now" or "she's carrying too many bags". I know this is bullshit because I've approached girls who I spot 50 metres in front of me and I have approached girls with their hands full.
Approach #1: Gorgeous blonde in an elegant black dress
Anyway, I meet up with Rey from All Stars on Bourke St. We have abit of a chat and we start hunting on Bourke St. Ahead of me I spot a blonde mane and a beautiful black dress. Not sure what her face looks like but what the hey I run after her.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm M
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I'm on my way back to work.
Me: Let me guess...accounting
Her: No I'm IT
Me: That's awesome. Me too. Hi-5 (she hi-5s back)
We chat abit about our experiences working in IT and she just happens to throw out that she has a boyfriend while we're chatting.
Me: Cool. I have a goldfish...seeing as we're chatting about things that don't really matter.
We chat for abit more before I eject.
Didn't go smoothly but she was very accomodating which kept the interaction going. I was starting to feel good.
Approach #2: Another blonde
By now you should know I love blondes. Long before I joined the community I would go out to nightclubs, stand at the back and marvel at the platinum blondes before I'd freak out and leave the club 30 minutes after entering.
I meet up with Sammy and Matt on Bourke St. As we're walking along I spot a cute blonde in a leather jacket (I love black leather on a woman) walk in front of us. Sammy spots me looking at her and he says "go dude". "I know" I say. I turn around and go after her. I open direct and she quickly mentions she has a boyfriend and storms off.
Approach #3: Beautiful redhead sitting on bench
I hate seated sets! This girl was beautiful dressed in a fitted long coat and black skirt. I'd walk past her a few times and I couldn't get myself to go talk to her. I'm talking to Matt about how cute the redhead sitting on the bench is and how much it hurts. Reminding myself to allow the anxiety to brew around my body I reached boiling point and went to talk to her.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm N
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I'm on my break.
Me: Let me guess David Jones. (pointing to her David Jones bag) What do you have there?
Her: Pumpkin chips. Want to try?
Me: Yeah. Why not?
Her: What are you upto today?
Me: I'm after some jeans. Are there any places you can recommend. (I was really out to buy some jeans but in the end I totally forgot). She named a few places. Then we started talking about fashion and how fashion can say alot about a person.
I made a warm read that based on how she dresses I saw her as someone confident and ambitious.
I have been using confident and ambitious alot. It seems too serious. I'm gonna start trying fun playful, adventurous...
I go for the number close. She says she has a boyfriend. I went with the goldfish thing. We chat for abit more and left.
Approach #4: Hot blonde
I'm on Bourke St and I spot a hot blonde from across the tram tracks. Wearing a skirt, long coat and scarf. There was no hesitation. I had to go.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm S
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I've been working and now I'm on my break.
Me: Let me guess. Retail?
Her: Yeah
Me: Look I'm after some jeans...maybe you can hook me up?
Her: Sorry but I work with womenswear.
Me: What are you discriminating?
Her: Haha...no
Me: Help me out what would you recommend?
Her: I'd love to help you out but I've got 20 minutes left on my break (I was thinking here that I should have gone with her on a quick instadate but I pussied out and go for the number close)
Me: Look before you go...you're not a serial killer are you?
Her: Haha...no
Me: Let's exchange details and we'll hang out.
Her: OK
We chat for abit more and I eject.
I text her a few minutes after:
Me: You'll never guess what happened after we spoke :) Khoi
Her: What happened?
It's epic. Best to tell you in person. Coffee tomorrow?
Yet to hear back from her.
Approach #5: Hot Asian but no English or socially retarded
I'm with Rey on Bourke St and I point out an Asian girl for him to approach. He's feeling some anxiety so I figured I do it. I open direct but she says "sorry I have to go".
There's something about me and Asian girls. They don't seem to like me. Some the harshest responses I've received from women have all been Asian even when I have had no intention of picking them up. Not that I would go for Asian girls but if someone could shed some light on why they would be bitchy or cold to me would be much appreciated.
Approach #6: Wavy haired brunette
We've done a few laps in the city. We we're at Melb central and there was hardly anything there. So back to Bourke St. I spot a gorgeous brunette walking towards Myer so I run after her.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm N
Seemed to go like the other approaches. She was in retail and on her way to work or on a break. I couldn't seem to push the interaction further. It got to the point where I was in my head. I go for the close but like every other approach, she has a boyfriend.
Approach #7: David Jones blondie
I'm starting to run out of ways to describe blondes. I spot a her walk into Sportsgirl, or the Black Hole as I like to call it. Women go in there and they never seem to come out or they pop into either rubi shoes or diva which are on either side.
Luckily for me she comes out and I run after her. I open direct. As you do. She's very receptive and we have abit of a chat but she has to go back to work. So I go for the number close. Boyfriend again :( We chat for abit more and I eject.
Approach #8: Blondie with exotic name
As Sammy and I are walking towards the train station to go home I spot a beautiful blonde walking past us. I say "you know what I'm thinking?" Sammy says "GO!" I turn around and run after her.
We exchange abit of banter and then I really had to head off so I went for the number close. Boyfriend...again!
Me: Whoa wait! I've known you for like 2 minutes and 37 seconds. You're moving too fast. I need love, trust and connection before we head down that path.
It gets a laugh and we chat for abit more before I eject.
I feel today was good in that I didn't feel as hesitant to approach like I have been in the past few days. I still have to focus on pushing the interaction further and taking an opportunity when it presents itself. I see myself building abit of momentum at the moment and I am looking forward to going out abit more and smashing it.
Today I was thinking about my approach trigger and tried to remember times when I had it and what I did. I think those times I was an approach machine I would let the feelings of anxiety brew across my whole body to the point where it just hurt too much that I had to approach. I kept that in mind for today.
I arrive in the city at around 1PM. I find the best time to do daygame in the city are at around 12ish when women are on their lunch breaks and about 5ish as they are going home. I'm walking around the city feeling massive approach anxiety. I've let alot of gorgeous women past me and there is all this bullshit going on in my head. For example, a cute girl would walk past me and I'd turn around to look at her and think "she's too far away now" or "she's carrying too many bags". I know this is bullshit because I've approached girls who I spot 50 metres in front of me and I have approached girls with their hands full.
Approach #1: Gorgeous blonde in an elegant black dress
Anyway, I meet up with Rey from All Stars on Bourke St. We have abit of a chat and we start hunting on Bourke St. Ahead of me I spot a blonde mane and a beautiful black dress. Not sure what her face looks like but what the hey I run after her.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm M
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I'm on my way back to work.
Me: Let me guess...accounting
Her: No I'm IT
Me: That's awesome. Me too. Hi-5 (she hi-5s back)
We chat abit about our experiences working in IT and she just happens to throw out that she has a boyfriend while we're chatting.
Me: Cool. I have a goldfish...seeing as we're chatting about things that don't really matter.
We chat for abit more before I eject.
Didn't go smoothly but she was very accomodating which kept the interaction going. I was starting to feel good.
Approach #2: Another blonde
By now you should know I love blondes. Long before I joined the community I would go out to nightclubs, stand at the back and marvel at the platinum blondes before I'd freak out and leave the club 30 minutes after entering.
I meet up with Sammy and Matt on Bourke St. As we're walking along I spot a cute blonde in a leather jacket (I love black leather on a woman) walk in front of us. Sammy spots me looking at her and he says "go dude". "I know" I say. I turn around and go after her. I open direct and she quickly mentions she has a boyfriend and storms off.
Approach #3: Beautiful redhead sitting on bench
I hate seated sets! This girl was beautiful dressed in a fitted long coat and black skirt. I'd walk past her a few times and I couldn't get myself to go talk to her. I'm talking to Matt about how cute the redhead sitting on the bench is and how much it hurts. Reminding myself to allow the anxiety to brew around my body I reached boiling point and went to talk to her.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm N
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I'm on my break.
Me: Let me guess David Jones. (pointing to her David Jones bag) What do you have there?
Her: Pumpkin chips. Want to try?
Me: Yeah. Why not?
Her: What are you upto today?
Me: I'm after some jeans. Are there any places you can recommend. (I was really out to buy some jeans but in the end I totally forgot). She named a few places. Then we started talking about fashion and how fashion can say alot about a person.
I made a warm read that based on how she dresses I saw her as someone confident and ambitious.
I have been using confident and ambitious alot. It seems too serious. I'm gonna start trying fun playful, adventurous...
I go for the number close. She says she has a boyfriend. I went with the goldfish thing. We chat for abit more and left.
Approach #4: Hot blonde
I'm on Bourke St and I spot a hot blonde from across the tram tracks. Wearing a skirt, long coat and scarf. There was no hesitation. I had to go.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm S
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I've been working and now I'm on my break.
Me: Let me guess. Retail?
Her: Yeah
Me: Look I'm after some jeans...maybe you can hook me up?
Her: Sorry but I work with womenswear.
Me: What are you discriminating?
Her: Haha...no
Me: Help me out what would you recommend?
Her: I'd love to help you out but I've got 20 minutes left on my break (I was thinking here that I should have gone with her on a quick instadate but I pussied out and go for the number close)
Me: Look before you go...you're not a serial killer are you?
Her: Haha...no
Me: Let's exchange details and we'll hang out.
Her: OK
We chat for abit more and I eject.
I text her a few minutes after:
Me: You'll never guess what happened after we spoke :) Khoi
Her: What happened?
It's epic. Best to tell you in person. Coffee tomorrow?
Yet to hear back from her.
Approach #5: Hot Asian but no English or socially retarded
I'm with Rey on Bourke St and I point out an Asian girl for him to approach. He's feeling some anxiety so I figured I do it. I open direct but she says "sorry I have to go".
There's something about me and Asian girls. They don't seem to like me. Some the harshest responses I've received from women have all been Asian even when I have had no intention of picking them up. Not that I would go for Asian girls but if someone could shed some light on why they would be bitchy or cold to me would be much appreciated.
Approach #6: Wavy haired brunette
We've done a few laps in the city. We we're at Melb central and there was hardly anything there. So back to Bourke St. I spot a gorgeous brunette walking towards Myer so I run after her.
Me: I know this is kinda random but I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm N
Seemed to go like the other approaches. She was in retail and on her way to work or on a break. I couldn't seem to push the interaction further. It got to the point where I was in my head. I go for the close but like every other approach, she has a boyfriend.
Approach #7: David Jones blondie
I'm starting to run out of ways to describe blondes. I spot a her walk into Sportsgirl, or the Black Hole as I like to call it. Women go in there and they never seem to come out or they pop into either rubi shoes or diva which are on either side.
Luckily for me she comes out and I run after her. I open direct. As you do. She's very receptive and we have abit of a chat but she has to go back to work. So I go for the number close. Boyfriend again :( We chat for abit more and I eject.
Approach #8: Blondie with exotic name
As Sammy and I are walking towards the train station to go home I spot a beautiful blonde walking past us. I say "you know what I'm thinking?" Sammy says "GO!" I turn around and run after her.
We exchange abit of banter and then I really had to head off so I went for the number close. Boyfriend...again!
Me: Whoa wait! I've known you for like 2 minutes and 37 seconds. You're moving too fast. I need love, trust and connection before we head down that path.
It gets a laugh and we chat for abit more before I eject.
I feel today was good in that I didn't feel as hesitant to approach like I have been in the past few days. I still have to focus on pushing the interaction further and taking an opportunity when it presents itself. I see myself building abit of momentum at the moment and I am looking forward to going out abit more and smashing it.
5 Things I am greatful for 24/06/2010
1. To be part of All Stars
2. Double Quarter pounders
3. Beautiful women
4. My health and fitness
5. Leather jackets
2. Double Quarter pounders
3. Beautiful women
4. My health and fitness
5. Leather jackets
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Daygame 23/06/2010: Melbourne CBD
I got in the city at about 3.30 in the afternoon. I walk out of Flinders St station and head towards Bourke St. Already, I am feeling some anxiety. I had let a few cuties walk past. I walk into 7/11 to get a drink. As I walk out I bump into Keilon Ziggy and...sorry can't remember your name. We have a bit of a chat and I'm back on my way to Bourke St. I meet up with Daryl, Sammy and Matt. They have been in the city for a while and have done quite well. We do a few laps around Bourke St but I couldn't get myself to approach. I was coming up with lame excuses (they must have been lame because I can't remember them now).
Approach #1: Cute redhead
Daryl and Sammy were in set while Matt and I were having abit of a chat. Matt spots a cute redhead walk past. I say "so are you going for her or am I?" He signalled something suggesting I should go. I run after her and before I catchup to her it appears she sees me in her peripheral so I open right there.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but I thought you were beautiful I just had to say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: (she lights up) Thankyou. I'm S
Me: So what adventures have you been upto?
Her: I'm just on my break. I work at David Jones (she sits on the bench)
After exchanging a few words I sit next to her. She says she's a makeup artist.
Me: I take it you're the creative type.
We went on a couple of different tangents which included our dreams, psychology, how she loves art...
I go for the number close but she's only interested as friends. She was reluctant to give her number so I go for her facebook. I was happy with this interaction as I feel I was taking the interaction further and getting her to invest. Sammy approached the same girl earlier in the day and she came across as boring. I'm guessing the use of warm and cold reads got more out of her and I was able to take the conversation somewhere.
Approach #2: Cute blondie
Sammy, Daryl, Matt and myself are walking inside Myer heading towards Melb central. I spot a cute blondie and I see Sammy wanting to go after her. I stop him and he agrees to let me go after her. She is walks inside Melb central when I catchup to her. I open direct. She looks at me and hastily walks off.
Approach #3: Cute blondie in leather jacket
This went the same way as the last approach only this time I didn't get in front of her when I opened. It was a disaster waiting to happen.
Approach #4: Blondie
We're at the traffic lights on the corner of Swanston St and Bourke when I spot a gorgeous blonde walk past. I walk over to her.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but I thought you were beautiful I just had to say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm S (I notice her accent)
Me: I noticed your accent. Where are you from?
Her: I'm from the US
Me: What brings you to Melbourne?
Her: I've been studying
Me: Let me guess...accounting
Her: No but you're close. I'm in marketing
Me: I take it you're the creative type.
Her: Yeah I think so
I was running out of things to follow up with so I go for the number close.
Me: Look I'd love to stick around...you're not a serial killer are you?
Her: No. I can't say I am.
Me: Cool. Let's exchange details and we'll hangout.
Her: Sorry but I'm leaving in 3 days.
Me: Cool. I'll make quick work of it. (I don't know what I was thinking when I said that but she seems cool with it)
She gives me her number. I probably should have stuck around abit longer before going for the close.
I texted her immediately after:
Me: You'll never guess what happened after we spoke :) Khoi
Her: What's that?
Me: It's epic. Best to tell you in person. Coffee tomorrow?
Yet to hear back from her. I got 3 days so must work fast :)
Apart from the girls who didn't give me a shot, I felt that I was starting to head back in the right direction. Today I was more focused on having a quality interaction and taking things one step further rather than going for closes. I feel like my approaches in the last few weeks have felt repetitive as if I'm trying to run the same thing on every single girl expecting the same results which is retarded.
Approach #1: Cute redhead
Daryl and Sammy were in set while Matt and I were having abit of a chat. Matt spots a cute redhead walk past. I say "so are you going for her or am I?" He signalled something suggesting I should go. I run after her and before I catchup to her it appears she sees me in her peripheral so I open right there.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but I thought you were beautiful I just had to say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: (she lights up) Thankyou. I'm S
Me: So what adventures have you been upto?
Her: I'm just on my break. I work at David Jones (she sits on the bench)
After exchanging a few words I sit next to her. She says she's a makeup artist.
Me: I take it you're the creative type.
We went on a couple of different tangents which included our dreams, psychology, how she loves art...
I go for the number close but she's only interested as friends. She was reluctant to give her number so I go for her facebook. I was happy with this interaction as I feel I was taking the interaction further and getting her to invest. Sammy approached the same girl earlier in the day and she came across as boring. I'm guessing the use of warm and cold reads got more out of her and I was able to take the conversation somewhere.
Approach #2: Cute blondie
Sammy, Daryl, Matt and myself are walking inside Myer heading towards Melb central. I spot a cute blondie and I see Sammy wanting to go after her. I stop him and he agrees to let me go after her. She is walks inside Melb central when I catchup to her. I open direct. She looks at me and hastily walks off.
Approach #3: Cute blondie in leather jacket
This went the same way as the last approach only this time I didn't get in front of her when I opened. It was a disaster waiting to happen.
Approach #4: Blondie
We're at the traffic lights on the corner of Swanston St and Bourke when I spot a gorgeous blonde walk past. I walk over to her.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but I thought you were beautiful I just had to say hi. I'm Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm S (I notice her accent)
Me: I noticed your accent. Where are you from?
Her: I'm from the US
Me: What brings you to Melbourne?
Her: I've been studying
Me: Let me guess...accounting
Her: No but you're close. I'm in marketing
Me: I take it you're the creative type.
Her: Yeah I think so
I was running out of things to follow up with so I go for the number close.
Me: Look I'd love to stick around...you're not a serial killer are you?
Her: No. I can't say I am.
Me: Cool. Let's exchange details and we'll hangout.
Her: Sorry but I'm leaving in 3 days.
Me: Cool. I'll make quick work of it. (I don't know what I was thinking when I said that but she seems cool with it)
She gives me her number. I probably should have stuck around abit longer before going for the close.
I texted her immediately after:
Me: You'll never guess what happened after we spoke :) Khoi
Her: What's that?
Me: It's epic. Best to tell you in person. Coffee tomorrow?
Yet to hear back from her. I got 3 days so must work fast :)
Apart from the girls who didn't give me a shot, I felt that I was starting to head back in the right direction. Today I was more focused on having a quality interaction and taking things one step further rather than going for closes. I feel like my approaches in the last few weeks have felt repetitive as if I'm trying to run the same thing on every single girl expecting the same results which is retarded.
5 Things I am greatful for 23/06/2010
1. Great support group who encourage me to bring the best out of myself
2. Lamb vindaloo
3. Sexy American blondes
4. Leather jackets
5. Health and fitness
2. Lamb vindaloo
3. Sexy American blondes
4. Leather jackets
5. Health and fitness
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
5 Things I am greatful for 22/06/2010
1. Souvlaki
2. BJJ
3. Great support group
4. My health and fitness
5. Feeling like my actions are having a positive influence on others
2. BJJ
3. Great support group
4. My health and fitness
5. Feeling like my actions are having a positive influence on others
Day game gone dry...
In the last month or so I feel like I have plateaued. I've been going out during the day whenever I had a day off work to meet some of Melbourne's finest. When I started pick-up I really hated daygame. To me it's more of a mental game compared to night game. During the day there is a long timeframe between each interaction so when I have a bad one it's easy for me to get in my head and by the time I've talked to 3 or 4 girls I'm exhausted.
A few things have changed my outlook on day game and as a result I do daygame more than I do nightgame. I did the conversation camp with Matt from Vin DiCarlo (I had my first lay from them game a couple days after) and I did the approach energy course. As a result of those workshops I have done more approaches during the day in the space of 2 months than I have done in my entire time since I got into the community (June 26 last year. I remember it well because it was the day Michael Jackson died. RIP). I've been talking to some of the most incredibly beautiful women and getting into fun interactions with them and it really did alot to get my confidence up. It's made me believe that while I may not be ready to have a super sexy, confident, ambitious and intelligent woman, I do believe I deserve her. I have invested time in making myself and giving values to those around me that it's only a matter of time.
In one month I did over 100 approaches, got over 20 numbers and only two dates. The last couple of weeks have been abit of a grind for me and has taken alot of fun out of daygame. I look back on where I was a couple of months ago and I am blown away by how much I have grown internally but at the same time I'm sometimes feel abit down that I'm not seeing the results externally. I have been journaling my adventures and you can find my past journal entries in my blog at becomethesavage.blogspot.com. It's not just about my adventures in pickup but in other areas of my life as well.
I have seen incredible progress as a result of journaling but have mainly kept it to myself. I am going to start putting my journal entries in the Lair as well as my blog to get some feedback from you guys as well as hope to serve as a source to inspire others to get out there and meet some lovely ladies.
I am going to be as open and as honest with my progress in my posts. I will write about all my successes, my failures, my absolute fuck ups and my discoveries. I don't want this to be a journal to brag about how I'm an awesome PUA because I am anything but that and don't want to be. I am looking to improve myself as a person and in order to do that I feel I have to strip myself bare. Not literally ;)
So here's my first field report...
21/06/2010: Melbourne CBD
Approach #1: Petite blonde cutie
I meet up with Daryl at Bourke St mall. We are chatting away when I spot a cute blonde walk on the other side of the tram tracks. I run after her and she walks into David Jones.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
I like to keep abit of a pause when I say "but". When I let the rest of the opener out they just seem to light up...well most of the time :)
Her: Thank you. I'm (insert name here)
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I work here
Me: So are you a saver or a spender?
Her: I don't know
Me: I take it you're someone who likes to put money aside but at the same time likes to take care of herself.
(I wanted to say "I take it you're the type of person who likes to pleasure yourself but at the same time you want to put money aside to follow your dreams". I've used it in the past and it seems to work well. Gives me an opportunity to get abit sexual. I was in my head today and was scared to pull it out.)
She said she had to go so I went for the number close.
Her: Sorry but I don't think my boyfriend would approve.
Me: Cool we can be best friends. (Thanks Tim)
I couldn't remember what she said after that...I ejected.
I been getting the "Sorry but I have a boyfriend" alot lately. I'm thinking the best way around it might be "who said anything about boyfriend? I've only known you for like 2 minutes. I need love, trust and connection before we go down that route"
Approach #2: Blonde, blue eyes and leather jacket.
Daryl and I were walking through Myer and I was telling him how I've had a thing for girls in leather jackets lately. Just was we walk out I spot a gorgeous blonde sparking blue eyes tight black pants and a fitted leather jacket. She looked badass. I let her walk past, turn around and stop her.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
Her: Thank you. I'm (insert name here)
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I work here
Me: So are you a saver or a spender?
Her: I'm a spender
Me: High maintenence! You sound like trouble. (cheeky smile)
We exchange abit of banter and I go for the number close. Boyfriend. :( We talk for abit more before I eject. Funny how the universe gives you a taste of what you want only to kick you in the face.
Approach #3: Corporate Glam. Slamming legs.
Legs. I love legs. I think my fascination for girls with amazing legs stem from Heather Locklear in Melrose Place. Sex in a mini-skirt...in an office. Legs and heels do alot to get my hormones racing. I was following another girl along Swanston St. This time it was a brunette in a leather jacket but I couldn't approach because she was on her phone. I was waiting for her to get off the phone. I had enough of following so I head back to join Daryl who is on Bourke St. Daryl is across the road waiting at the traffic lights. I spot a super hot blonde with sexy legs and heels. I had to approach. I'm looking at Daryl and I point her out to him. I cross the road, look at Daryl and run after sexy legs.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
Her: Thankyou. I'm (insert name here)
Me: So what adventures have you been upto today?
Her: Sorry but I really have to go but thankyou.
She walks off
I was needing a drink so Daryl and I walk to 7/11. We spot a gorgeous brunette waiting outside. I tell him by the time I walk out I want to see you talking to her. I grab a coke and wait in line. While I am waiting the brunette walks in and I look out the window and give Daryl the "what happened?" look. I pay for the drink and walk out. I tell him once she walks out to go after her. She walks out of the store and walks past us. After abit of hesitation, Daryl runs after her. The interaction seems to be going very well. He's engaged her and locked her in. He moves her away so that they aren't in the way of the afterwork crowd. I look around to see if there are any other girls around. Most of them are in a group. I really hate groups. I've done them before with success but I don't know why I can't get myself to do them again. Anyway, I watch Daryl and it seems to be going way too well. Damn! I hate him. I am blown away by his progress since I first met him at approach energy. He has come a long way. I feel I can learn alot just by observing him.
There was another girl I spotted as I was walking towards Collins St. Mini-skirt, boots and long coat. I went after her. She walks into the post office so I follow her in. She waits in line and turns for a second and holds eye contact with me. I know at this point I should have opened but I was in my head. So I wandered in the post office for a bit and walked out. I knew at that second I had to open. Next time.
Notes: I feel like I'm not pushing the interaction far enough and I'm not building much of a connection. Even if I did number close any of the girls I don't feel they would have stuck. I need to look to push things one step further. I think I've been focused too much on establishing a flirty vibe that I am forgetting to build a connection. On a positive note, the last few weeks I have been reluctant to approach my type of girls. This day was different in that the feelings being triggered within me made me approach these girls. In the past these feelings would make me shy away but today it was almost a necessity to approach them. Except the post office girl... wait, she wasn't wearing a leather jacket.
22/06/2010: Melbourne CBD
I wanted to hit the city ealier today but I had to drop off my car to get fixed. I arrived in the city at around 4. I also had BJJ tonight so I didn't have much time to do some approaches.
Approach #1: Blondie...girl next door type.
I meet up with Sammy and Daryl at Bourke St mall. They have been in the city for a while and we talk about how they went. While they were talking I spot a cute blonde. Fair skinned not "POW!" hot but there was something about her.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
I'm starting to sound like a one-trick pony.
Her:Thankyou. Did you win your dare?
I was thrown off by this. I should have rolled with it. Maybe something like "yes so what do I win?" By this point she's walked off.
Approach #2: Swedish blondie
Sammy, Daryl and I are at Bourke St mall. It's here where Jonathan joins us as well. We walk around the streets doing stupid shit like screeching like a velociraptor and this weird hand explosion thingy which really creeped this girl out. As we're talking Sammy spots a hot blonde walk past. He points her out and he say "she's your type. GO!" I run after her. I touch her lightly on the arm and she freaks out.
Me: Sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out.
I smile and lean back a little and give her a moment to calm down.
Her: No it's OK. I was in my own little world.
Me: Look. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
Her: Thankyou. I'm (insert name here)
Me: I noticed you accent. Where are you from?
Her: I'm from Sweden
Me: What brings you to Melbourne?
Her: I work here
Me: I'm guessing accounting
Her: No
I smile and hold eye contact.
Her: actually I'm an economist.
As receptive as she was I was stuck on things to say. I went for the number close but she wasn't interested.
Approach #3: Another blonde
There seems to be an abundance of blondes in the city recently which comes to me as a surprise as there hasn't been much recently. It's like they go on hibernation during the winter months. We're at Melbourne Central and I spot a blonde looking at the directory. I walk up to her.
Me: It's over there and point to some random direction.
Her: What are you talking about?
Me: What are you looking for?
Her: haha...I'm looking for the nuts shop
Me: I'd help you but I don't have a clue. Are you from around here?
Her: Yeah but I don't know my way around here.
I ran out of things to say here so I ejected. I've had enough. I'm going to BJJ.
Approach #4: Gorgeous brunette
I'm on the train home and I'm listening to my ipod. The seats around me are empty. Then a homeless guy sits on one of the chairs in front of me. I'm doing my best to beathe through my mouth. He is wearing this bush hat and has this crazy beard. I couldn't wait for him to get off.
He finally got off the train and I was able to breathe again. I was immersed in the music I was listening to when I spot a gorgeous brunette sitting across from me. She's reading an MX and snacking on potato chips. Damn! I want to talk to her. I looking around the train. I see people sitting in the seats near where I'm sitting and I'm thinking to myself "shit! What would they think of me?" I'm sitting there running this internal dialogue justifying why I should/shouldn't talk to her. The train stops at Clayton station. Something came over me. I just had to talk to her. The train starts moving. Everytime I try to open my mouth she picks up some chips and puts it into her mouth. Damn chips! I'm getting closer to my stop so I'm like fuck it.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is kinda random but I think you're really beautiful. I had to say hi. My name is Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm (insert name here)
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I've been working.
Me: Let me guess...retail
Her: no actually market research.
Me: I take it you're the creative type.
Her: yeah, sorta...
I pause for abit...thinking of something to say
Me: you know it's funny how people on the train don't talk to each other
Her:Yeah it's not normal to pick-up on the train
Me: So what's the worst pick-up line you've ever heard?
Her: I don't know but I should mention I have a boyfriend.
Me: Cool! I have a goldfish.
Her: Haha...That's nice. You know people don't really do this.
Me: would you rather a drunk sleazy guy in the club or someone genuine say on the train?
Her: Someone genuine.
Me: So what excitement do you have planned for the evening?
Her: Nothing really.
Me: yeah it's good to wind down after a hard days work.
Then she goes on a ramble about how she hates her job. I assumed she worked in marketing and she's quick to correct me. She wouldn't cope in those environments.
Me: I'm curious to know what their strike rates are. They mus get alot of "fuck offs"
Her: Yeah I wouldn't be able to put up with that all the time.
Me: It sounds like you don't take rejection well
Her: Not really
Then I went on to tell her a story about Buddha and rejection. Something along the lines of if you were to take rejection personally it's a reflection of you but if you choose not to accept it it's a reflection of them. My train arrive at my stop so I said goodbye.
I was really happy with this interaction. Much more solid than the other interactions I've had today. Even though I didn't go for a close, never in my mind would I have opened a girl on the train a few months ago. I feel I have smashed a social barrier. I tend to shy away from girls who are seated. It's like you have the girl isolated and I worry about running out of things to say. I tend to go for girls who are standing or walking because I know I am working with a short time frame. Though the seated sets I've done recently have gone really well, there's still that fear going on in the back of my head.
The last couple of days I feel like I haven't been pushing interactions far enough. I've just been going in there and looking to close as quick as possible. I think it's time to take a step back and focus more on having a solid interaction and let the number close be the by product of a solid interaction. I need to listen to what she says more and stop trying to think of things to say. I need to give the woman room to invest because I know she will invest if I just give her some space rather than ramble on.
More to come...
A few things have changed my outlook on day game and as a result I do daygame more than I do nightgame. I did the conversation camp with Matt from Vin DiCarlo (I had my first lay from them game a couple days after) and I did the approach energy course. As a result of those workshops I have done more approaches during the day in the space of 2 months than I have done in my entire time since I got into the community (June 26 last year. I remember it well because it was the day Michael Jackson died. RIP). I've been talking to some of the most incredibly beautiful women and getting into fun interactions with them and it really did alot to get my confidence up. It's made me believe that while I may not be ready to have a super sexy, confident, ambitious and intelligent woman, I do believe I deserve her. I have invested time in making myself and giving values to those around me that it's only a matter of time.
In one month I did over 100 approaches, got over 20 numbers and only two dates. The last couple of weeks have been abit of a grind for me and has taken alot of fun out of daygame. I look back on where I was a couple of months ago and I am blown away by how much I have grown internally but at the same time I'm sometimes feel abit down that I'm not seeing the results externally. I have been journaling my adventures and you can find my past journal entries in my blog at becomethesavage.blogspot.com. It's not just about my adventures in pickup but in other areas of my life as well.
I have seen incredible progress as a result of journaling but have mainly kept it to myself. I am going to start putting my journal entries in the Lair as well as my blog to get some feedback from you guys as well as hope to serve as a source to inspire others to get out there and meet some lovely ladies.
I am going to be as open and as honest with my progress in my posts. I will write about all my successes, my failures, my absolute fuck ups and my discoveries. I don't want this to be a journal to brag about how I'm an awesome PUA because I am anything but that and don't want to be. I am looking to improve myself as a person and in order to do that I feel I have to strip myself bare. Not literally ;)
So here's my first field report...
21/06/2010: Melbourne CBD
Approach #1: Petite blonde cutie
I meet up with Daryl at Bourke St mall. We are chatting away when I spot a cute blonde walk on the other side of the tram tracks. I run after her and she walks into David Jones.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
I like to keep abit of a pause when I say "but". When I let the rest of the opener out they just seem to light up...well most of the time :)
Her: Thank you. I'm (insert name here)
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I work here
Me: So are you a saver or a spender?
Her: I don't know
Me: I take it you're someone who likes to put money aside but at the same time likes to take care of herself.
(I wanted to say "I take it you're the type of person who likes to pleasure yourself but at the same time you want to put money aside to follow your dreams". I've used it in the past and it seems to work well. Gives me an opportunity to get abit sexual. I was in my head today and was scared to pull it out.)
She said she had to go so I went for the number close.
Her: Sorry but I don't think my boyfriend would approve.
Me: Cool we can be best friends. (Thanks Tim)
I couldn't remember what she said after that...I ejected.
I been getting the "Sorry but I have a boyfriend" alot lately. I'm thinking the best way around it might be "who said anything about boyfriend? I've only known you for like 2 minutes. I need love, trust and connection before we go down that route"
Approach #2: Blonde, blue eyes and leather jacket.
Daryl and I were walking through Myer and I was telling him how I've had a thing for girls in leather jackets lately. Just was we walk out I spot a gorgeous blonde sparking blue eyes tight black pants and a fitted leather jacket. She looked badass. I let her walk past, turn around and stop her.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
Her: Thank you. I'm (insert name here)
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I work here
Me: So are you a saver or a spender?
Her: I'm a spender
Me: High maintenence! You sound like trouble. (cheeky smile)
We exchange abit of banter and I go for the number close. Boyfriend. :( We talk for abit more before I eject. Funny how the universe gives you a taste of what you want only to kick you in the face.
Approach #3: Corporate Glam. Slamming legs.
Legs. I love legs. I think my fascination for girls with amazing legs stem from Heather Locklear in Melrose Place. Sex in a mini-skirt...in an office. Legs and heels do alot to get my hormones racing. I was following another girl along Swanston St. This time it was a brunette in a leather jacket but I couldn't approach because she was on her phone. I was waiting for her to get off the phone. I had enough of following so I head back to join Daryl who is on Bourke St. Daryl is across the road waiting at the traffic lights. I spot a super hot blonde with sexy legs and heels. I had to approach. I'm looking at Daryl and I point her out to him. I cross the road, look at Daryl and run after sexy legs.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
Her: Thankyou. I'm (insert name here)
Me: So what adventures have you been upto today?
Her: Sorry but I really have to go but thankyou.
She walks off
I was needing a drink so Daryl and I walk to 7/11. We spot a gorgeous brunette waiting outside. I tell him by the time I walk out I want to see you talking to her. I grab a coke and wait in line. While I am waiting the brunette walks in and I look out the window and give Daryl the "what happened?" look. I pay for the drink and walk out. I tell him once she walks out to go after her. She walks out of the store and walks past us. After abit of hesitation, Daryl runs after her. The interaction seems to be going very well. He's engaged her and locked her in. He moves her away so that they aren't in the way of the afterwork crowd. I look around to see if there are any other girls around. Most of them are in a group. I really hate groups. I've done them before with success but I don't know why I can't get myself to do them again. Anyway, I watch Daryl and it seems to be going way too well. Damn! I hate him. I am blown away by his progress since I first met him at approach energy. He has come a long way. I feel I can learn alot just by observing him.
There was another girl I spotted as I was walking towards Collins St. Mini-skirt, boots and long coat. I went after her. She walks into the post office so I follow her in. She waits in line and turns for a second and holds eye contact with me. I know at this point I should have opened but I was in my head. So I wandered in the post office for a bit and walked out. I knew at that second I had to open. Next time.
Notes: I feel like I'm not pushing the interaction far enough and I'm not building much of a connection. Even if I did number close any of the girls I don't feel they would have stuck. I need to look to push things one step further. I think I've been focused too much on establishing a flirty vibe that I am forgetting to build a connection. On a positive note, the last few weeks I have been reluctant to approach my type of girls. This day was different in that the feelings being triggered within me made me approach these girls. In the past these feelings would make me shy away but today it was almost a necessity to approach them. Except the post office girl... wait, she wasn't wearing a leather jacket.
22/06/2010: Melbourne CBD
I wanted to hit the city ealier today but I had to drop off my car to get fixed. I arrived in the city at around 4. I also had BJJ tonight so I didn't have much time to do some approaches.
Approach #1: Blondie...girl next door type.
I meet up with Sammy and Daryl at Bourke St mall. They have been in the city for a while and we talk about how they went. While they were talking I spot a cute blonde. Fair skinned not "POW!" hot but there was something about her.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
I'm starting to sound like a one-trick pony.
Her:Thankyou. Did you win your dare?
I was thrown off by this. I should have rolled with it. Maybe something like "yes so what do I win?" By this point she's walked off.
Approach #2: Swedish blondie
Sammy, Daryl and I are at Bourke St mall. It's here where Jonathan joins us as well. We walk around the streets doing stupid shit like screeching like a velociraptor and this weird hand explosion thingy which really creeped this girl out. As we're talking Sammy spots a hot blonde walk past. He points her out and he say "she's your type. GO!" I run after her. I touch her lightly on the arm and she freaks out.
Me: Sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out.
I smile and lean back a little and give her a moment to calm down.
Her: No it's OK. I was in my own little world.
Me: Look. I know this is totally out of the blue but... I thought you were really beautiful. I had to come over and say hi. My name's Khoi.
Her: Thankyou. I'm (insert name here)
Me: I noticed you accent. Where are you from?
Her: I'm from Sweden
Me: What brings you to Melbourne?
Her: I work here
Me: I'm guessing accounting
Her: No
I smile and hold eye contact.
Her: actually I'm an economist.
As receptive as she was I was stuck on things to say. I went for the number close but she wasn't interested.
Approach #3: Another blonde
There seems to be an abundance of blondes in the city recently which comes to me as a surprise as there hasn't been much recently. It's like they go on hibernation during the winter months. We're at Melbourne Central and I spot a blonde looking at the directory. I walk up to her.
Me: It's over there and point to some random direction.
Her: What are you talking about?
Me: What are you looking for?
Her: haha...I'm looking for the nuts shop
Me: I'd help you but I don't have a clue. Are you from around here?
Her: Yeah but I don't know my way around here.
I ran out of things to say here so I ejected. I've had enough. I'm going to BJJ.
Approach #4: Gorgeous brunette
I'm on the train home and I'm listening to my ipod. The seats around me are empty. Then a homeless guy sits on one of the chairs in front of me. I'm doing my best to beathe through my mouth. He is wearing this bush hat and has this crazy beard. I couldn't wait for him to get off.
He finally got off the train and I was able to breathe again. I was immersed in the music I was listening to when I spot a gorgeous brunette sitting across from me. She's reading an MX and snacking on potato chips. Damn! I want to talk to her. I looking around the train. I see people sitting in the seats near where I'm sitting and I'm thinking to myself "shit! What would they think of me?" I'm sitting there running this internal dialogue justifying why I should/shouldn't talk to her. The train stops at Clayton station. Something came over me. I just had to talk to her. The train starts moving. Everytime I try to open my mouth she picks up some chips and puts it into her mouth. Damn chips! I'm getting closer to my stop so I'm like fuck it.
Me: Excuse me. I know this is kinda random but I think you're really beautiful. I had to say hi. My name is Khoi
Her: Thankyou. I'm (insert name here)
Me: What adventures have you been upto today?
Her: I've been working.
Me: Let me guess...retail
Her: no actually market research.
Me: I take it you're the creative type.
Her: yeah, sorta...
I pause for abit...thinking of something to say
Me: you know it's funny how people on the train don't talk to each other
Her:Yeah it's not normal to pick-up on the train
Me: So what's the worst pick-up line you've ever heard?
Her: I don't know but I should mention I have a boyfriend.
Me: Cool! I have a goldfish.
Her: Haha...That's nice. You know people don't really do this.
Me: would you rather a drunk sleazy guy in the club or someone genuine say on the train?
Her: Someone genuine.
Me: So what excitement do you have planned for the evening?
Her: Nothing really.
Me: yeah it's good to wind down after a hard days work.
Then she goes on a ramble about how she hates her job. I assumed she worked in marketing and she's quick to correct me. She wouldn't cope in those environments.
Me: I'm curious to know what their strike rates are. They mus get alot of "fuck offs"
Her: Yeah I wouldn't be able to put up with that all the time.
Me: It sounds like you don't take rejection well
Her: Not really
Then I went on to tell her a story about Buddha and rejection. Something along the lines of if you were to take rejection personally it's a reflection of you but if you choose not to accept it it's a reflection of them. My train arrive at my stop so I said goodbye.
I was really happy with this interaction. Much more solid than the other interactions I've had today. Even though I didn't go for a close, never in my mind would I have opened a girl on the train a few months ago. I feel I have smashed a social barrier. I tend to shy away from girls who are seated. It's like you have the girl isolated and I worry about running out of things to say. I tend to go for girls who are standing or walking because I know I am working with a short time frame. Though the seated sets I've done recently have gone really well, there's still that fear going on in the back of my head.
The last couple of days I feel like I haven't been pushing interactions far enough. I've just been going in there and looking to close as quick as possible. I think it's time to take a step back and focus more on having a solid interaction and let the number close be the by product of a solid interaction. I need to listen to what she says more and stop trying to think of things to say. I need to give the woman room to invest because I know she will invest if I just give her some space rather than ramble on.
More to come...
Monday, June 21, 2010
5 Things I am greatful for 21/06/2010
1. Great group of friends who bring the best out of me
2. Butter chicken
3. Great sleep
4. Shelter
5. My health
2. Butter chicken
3. Great sleep
4. Shelter
5. My health
Saturday, June 19, 2010
My lifestyle in 12 months
I wake up to a blowjob and blow my load on the face of a beautiful blonde girl. An incredible sight :) Feeling like a king I jump out of bed ready to take on whatever the world throws at me. I walk into the bathroom in an apartment I am glad to call home. I look at myself in the mirror and see this incredibly sexy man. A solid build, six-pack abs and a gorgeous smile that makes women melt. I flirt with myself in front of the mirror for about five minutes before I freshen up, take a shower and get ready for work. I put on a fitted suit. It makes me feel amazing. I feel like there is a warm aura beeming around me. If I were to walk into a room people would wonder "there's something about this guy. Who is he?"
I sit at the dining table in front of the laptop checking my e-mails, facebook, etc... while the beautiful blonde girl is serving me breakfast. Bacon and eggs, and orange juice. As I am having breakfast, I look out the window and I see the sun, clear skies and the city skyline. I think to myself how greatful I am to be waking up to an amazing day such as this is and how greatful I am to be alive.
Off to work I go. I give blondie a kiss and head out. I walk onto the footpath. I could take the tram today but I figure it's such a nice day, I'm gonna take a walk. As I walk past people, I look them in the eye and give them a warm smile and say "Hi". I arrive at work early as usual. I use this time to jump on-line and check out my finances. I have just been paid. My shares all went up. I can't see see how I had money problems 12 months ago. My boss walks in and I get up and we have a chat for a bit. I really enjoy working with him and I think it's great to be working with someone I feel close with. I'm happy to be at work. It's a place where I am being challenged and at the same time I am in an environment which is inspiring and encouraging. I love my workmates. Not only do we get along at work, we get on well afterwork. It's great to be working amongst a bunch of people who inspire you to be your best.
After work I goto the gym and absolutely smash it! I feel like an animal. Every rep I do makes me feel stronger and stronger. I have a snack before heading to BJJ. I have recently got my blue belt. To me it is an amazing achievement as I have put in alot of time and effort. This is the beginning of an amazing journey and it's great to be part of a club which is very encouraging and supportive. I also feel an obligation to help others as I have been through the pain that the white belts have gone through.
I go home and this time it's not blondie but an elegant, tall and beautiful brunette. She's incredibly intelligent and we chat over dinner about our day and the adventures we have been up to. After dinner we sit on the couch and we are giving each other foot rubs while watching TV. We freshen up with a shower then head to the bedroom for some animalistic sex before I fall asleep.
My weekends would be spent having afternoon sessions with my close friends. People who add value to my life and people who I feel I can add value to theirs. Beer, good food, good company. That or I would be enjoying some amazing adventure such as snowboarding, surfing, dancing... I would also find the time to spend with my family and build our tight bond.
I see myself going on one of my yearly trips overseas. I'm thinking Europe. Two weeks seducing some of the world's most beautiful women while building amazing life experiences with people who I consider my friends.
I see myself as a man who is confident. A man who enriches others lives. A man who influences and inspires people to be the best they can be. Someone who is fun, sociable, sexual, flirty. A man who is amazing with women. A man people look upto. I will be a man who lives life with a purpose. A man who is living to leave behind a legacy.
I sit at the dining table in front of the laptop checking my e-mails, facebook, etc... while the beautiful blonde girl is serving me breakfast. Bacon and eggs, and orange juice. As I am having breakfast, I look out the window and I see the sun, clear skies and the city skyline. I think to myself how greatful I am to be waking up to an amazing day such as this is and how greatful I am to be alive.
Off to work I go. I give blondie a kiss and head out. I walk onto the footpath. I could take the tram today but I figure it's such a nice day, I'm gonna take a walk. As I walk past people, I look them in the eye and give them a warm smile and say "Hi". I arrive at work early as usual. I use this time to jump on-line and check out my finances. I have just been paid. My shares all went up. I can't see see how I had money problems 12 months ago. My boss walks in and I get up and we have a chat for a bit. I really enjoy working with him and I think it's great to be working with someone I feel close with. I'm happy to be at work. It's a place where I am being challenged and at the same time I am in an environment which is inspiring and encouraging. I love my workmates. Not only do we get along at work, we get on well afterwork. It's great to be working amongst a bunch of people who inspire you to be your best.
After work I goto the gym and absolutely smash it! I feel like an animal. Every rep I do makes me feel stronger and stronger. I have a snack before heading to BJJ. I have recently got my blue belt. To me it is an amazing achievement as I have put in alot of time and effort. This is the beginning of an amazing journey and it's great to be part of a club which is very encouraging and supportive. I also feel an obligation to help others as I have been through the pain that the white belts have gone through.
I go home and this time it's not blondie but an elegant, tall and beautiful brunette. She's incredibly intelligent and we chat over dinner about our day and the adventures we have been up to. After dinner we sit on the couch and we are giving each other foot rubs while watching TV. We freshen up with a shower then head to the bedroom for some animalistic sex before I fall asleep.
My weekends would be spent having afternoon sessions with my close friends. People who add value to my life and people who I feel I can add value to theirs. Beer, good food, good company. That or I would be enjoying some amazing adventure such as snowboarding, surfing, dancing... I would also find the time to spend with my family and build our tight bond.
I see myself going on one of my yearly trips overseas. I'm thinking Europe. Two weeks seducing some of the world's most beautiful women while building amazing life experiences with people who I consider my friends.
I see myself as a man who is confident. A man who enriches others lives. A man who influences and inspires people to be the best they can be. Someone who is fun, sociable, sexual, flirty. A man who is amazing with women. A man people look upto. I will be a man who lives life with a purpose. A man who is living to leave behind a legacy.
Nightgame 19/06/2010
In the last few weeks I have been making minimal progress in terms of pick-up and I have been complacent with just getting the woman's number and letting them flake on me. I know what I am doing wrong and yet I am not taking the time to look back on the interactions and see where I have gone wrong. My journaling with pick-up has been very slim recently which probably explains why I haven't been pushing things further. Last night I went out with Sammy and a few guys from the Lair. It wasn't eventful for me but I think it's important to write my successes and failures.
I come home from work yesterday and I was spent. I only had a few hours sleep the night before and I wasn't really up for going out. I get a call from Sammy and he asks me to come with him to a singles night in Fitzroy. I'm telling him I'm tired and I got work tomorrow but he doesn't budge...OK, I'll go. Sammy picks me up from my place and we head out.
As we're driving up there Sammy talks about how he's struggled in learning pick-up and how recent events has inspired him to want to get better. Though he may not see it himself, I feel he is making some awesome progress. I feel alot of guys who get into pick-up are coming from a better place than I was when I got into pick-up. Alot of guys I meet already possess traits which I am trying to develop myself.
Anyway, we go to the singles bar and it's dead empty. There were some ladies in their 30s or 40s so we had a drink of water then left. We decide to goto Bimbos where we meet some guys from the Lair.
First set Sammy approaches and starts talking to a group of girls so I join in. I'm talking to one of the girls:
Me: What trouble are you guys plotting tonight?
Her: No trouble. We're just hanging out with friends
Me: Sure you are (sarcastic tone) I'm gonna be watching you
Her: (giggles)
Me: So what are you celebrating?
Her: It's our high school reunion
Me: Cool. So out of you guys who screwed up and who made it?
Her: (giggles)
Me: I take it you were one of the screw ups
She didn't quite receive it well and turned away. I don't think my tone was insulting or anything.
We head upstairs and join the Lair guys. We have a chat for a bit then Sammy and I hit the dancefloor. The rest of the guys join us soon after. There were some cuties out there but I couldn't get myself to open. In my peripheral I spot a girl with braids, she was fairly cute. I grab her attention, take her hand, spin and pull her in. Her hand was sticky.
Me: eww! Where have your hands been?
Her: I'm sorry! It's just water.
Me: As long as I don't get AIDS.
Her: (giggles)
I couldn't remember what I said after that. We danced for abit more and then joined the guys.
I'm dancing away and I start popping and locking. An Asian girl comes along and starts trying to mimic me. I take her hand, spin her and pull her in. We exchange a few words before she says she's going to the bar to get some drinks.
Sammy and I head to the bar and we spot two hotties on the dancefloor. I want to open but I'm really feeling the anxiety. Sammy asks "what would you open with?". I say "I wouldn't. I'd use a non-verbal opener. The music is loud I wouldn't be able to talk to her."
We hit the dancefloor and dance within their proximity waiting for an opportunity to attack. The girl I fancied started scanning around. Bang! I went in the caught her attention. I took her hand, spun her around and drew her in (one trick pony...haha).
Me: You guys are the only ones having fun here tonight
Her: I know...blah, blah
Me: what are you guys celebrating?
Her: It's my friend's birthday...she's coming later.
I introduce myself then introduce Sammy. As receptive as they were I wasn't able to push the interaction anywhere. I just wasn't feeling it last night.
Sammy saw a cute blondie sitting down and seemed to be doing well. Me and the Lair guys head to Perseverance. There was abit of a party crowd and I felt I could have done some damage but I was tired...(come to think of it, I was a pussy). I stay there for abit before Sammy came along and we headed back to Bimbos.
We head back and we see one of the two hotties from before. This time the birthday girl was there. I felt reluctant to re-initiate the interaction. I wasn't feeling it. We're on the dancefloor and some guy was giving out glowsticks which I thought was pretty cool. I'm dancing away when I spot a girl from across the room. I lock eyes with her and she comes over. We get fairly close and dance for abit. We exchange a few words and I turn back to the guys. A few more times during the night I would dance for abit but I wasn't pushing it.
I was spent and I had to goto work tomorrow. Sammy and I left. I was abit bummed out but as I am typing this and look back, it wasn't actually a bad night. Even though I wasn't feeling my best I was getting myself out there. It also helped having the support of some really cool guys. Not every night is gonna end in magic. I can't beat myself up for it. I need to learn to relax more and just have fun out there. Something I feel I have been missing in the last few of weeks.
I come home from work yesterday and I was spent. I only had a few hours sleep the night before and I wasn't really up for going out. I get a call from Sammy and he asks me to come with him to a singles night in Fitzroy. I'm telling him I'm tired and I got work tomorrow but he doesn't budge...OK, I'll go. Sammy picks me up from my place and we head out.
As we're driving up there Sammy talks about how he's struggled in learning pick-up and how recent events has inspired him to want to get better. Though he may not see it himself, I feel he is making some awesome progress. I feel alot of guys who get into pick-up are coming from a better place than I was when I got into pick-up. Alot of guys I meet already possess traits which I am trying to develop myself.
Anyway, we go to the singles bar and it's dead empty. There were some ladies in their 30s or 40s so we had a drink of water then left. We decide to goto Bimbos where we meet some guys from the Lair.
First set Sammy approaches and starts talking to a group of girls so I join in. I'm talking to one of the girls:
Me: What trouble are you guys plotting tonight?
Her: No trouble. We're just hanging out with friends
Me: Sure you are (sarcastic tone) I'm gonna be watching you
Her: (giggles)
Me: So what are you celebrating?
Her: It's our high school reunion
Me: Cool. So out of you guys who screwed up and who made it?
Her: (giggles)
Me: I take it you were one of the screw ups
She didn't quite receive it well and turned away. I don't think my tone was insulting or anything.
We head upstairs and join the Lair guys. We have a chat for a bit then Sammy and I hit the dancefloor. The rest of the guys join us soon after. There were some cuties out there but I couldn't get myself to open. In my peripheral I spot a girl with braids, she was fairly cute. I grab her attention, take her hand, spin and pull her in. Her hand was sticky.
Me: eww! Where have your hands been?
Her: I'm sorry! It's just water.
Me: As long as I don't get AIDS.
Her: (giggles)
I couldn't remember what I said after that. We danced for abit more and then joined the guys.
I'm dancing away and I start popping and locking. An Asian girl comes along and starts trying to mimic me. I take her hand, spin her and pull her in. We exchange a few words before she says she's going to the bar to get some drinks.
Sammy and I head to the bar and we spot two hotties on the dancefloor. I want to open but I'm really feeling the anxiety. Sammy asks "what would you open with?". I say "I wouldn't. I'd use a non-verbal opener. The music is loud I wouldn't be able to talk to her."
We hit the dancefloor and dance within their proximity waiting for an opportunity to attack. The girl I fancied started scanning around. Bang! I went in the caught her attention. I took her hand, spun her around and drew her in (one trick pony...haha).
Me: You guys are the only ones having fun here tonight
Her: I know...blah, blah
Me: what are you guys celebrating?
Her: It's my friend's birthday...she's coming later.
I introduce myself then introduce Sammy. As receptive as they were I wasn't able to push the interaction anywhere. I just wasn't feeling it last night.
Sammy saw a cute blondie sitting down and seemed to be doing well. Me and the Lair guys head to Perseverance. There was abit of a party crowd and I felt I could have done some damage but I was tired...(come to think of it, I was a pussy). I stay there for abit before Sammy came along and we headed back to Bimbos.
We head back and we see one of the two hotties from before. This time the birthday girl was there. I felt reluctant to re-initiate the interaction. I wasn't feeling it. We're on the dancefloor and some guy was giving out glowsticks which I thought was pretty cool. I'm dancing away when I spot a girl from across the room. I lock eyes with her and she comes over. We get fairly close and dance for abit. We exchange a few words and I turn back to the guys. A few more times during the night I would dance for abit but I wasn't pushing it.
I was spent and I had to goto work tomorrow. Sammy and I left. I was abit bummed out but as I am typing this and look back, it wasn't actually a bad night. Even though I wasn't feeling my best I was getting myself out there. It also helped having the support of some really cool guys. Not every night is gonna end in magic. I can't beat myself up for it. I need to learn to relax more and just have fun out there. Something I feel I have been missing in the last few of weeks.
Personal Foundation Program - 50 unresolved issues
1. Debt
2. Working within a job which does not align with my values
3. Unpaid fines
4. Sexual insecurities
5. Establishing a bond with my parents
6. Not putting the effort I know I am capable of
7. Not being upfront and honest with others
8. Being open about my fears
9. Helping my brother out
10.Alcohol/Drugs...I don't take as much as I used to but I do take it to the extent that it screws with my head.
11.Taking care of myself...recently I have gone through a slight binge of self-sabotage.
12.Finding thinge that make me happy
13.Giving more time to myself. I need to get in my head that it's OK to say "NO" sometimes. My wellbeing is much more important.
14.Coming up with excuses for not taking action
15.Expressing my feelings more often
16.My hip injury. I'm not young anymore and it hasn't got any better in the past few months. Get something done.
17.Sell my motorcycle gear. I don't ride anymore and it's taking up space
18.Get my car fixed...or otherwise sell it
19.Allowing myself to be influenced by the wrong people
20.Blaming my past for my failures. I need to let it go and focus more on the moment
21.Putting up with my home situation
22.Putting up with negativity
23.Being complacent
24.Blaming others for my failures
2. Working within a job which does not align with my values
3. Unpaid fines
4. Sexual insecurities
5. Establishing a bond with my parents
6. Not putting the effort I know I am capable of
7. Not being upfront and honest with others
8. Being open about my fears
9. Helping my brother out
10.Alcohol/Drugs...I don't take as much as I used to but I do take it to the extent that it screws with my head.
11.Taking care of myself...recently I have gone through a slight binge of self-sabotage.
12.Finding thinge that make me happy
13.Giving more time to myself. I need to get in my head that it's OK to say "NO" sometimes. My wellbeing is much more important.
14.Coming up with excuses for not taking action
15.Expressing my feelings more often
16.My hip injury. I'm not young anymore and it hasn't got any better in the past few months. Get something done.
17.Sell my motorcycle gear. I don't ride anymore and it's taking up space
18.Get my car fixed...or otherwise sell it
19.Allowing myself to be influenced by the wrong people
20.Blaming my past for my failures. I need to let it go and focus more on the moment
21.Putting up with my home situation
22.Putting up with negativity
23.Being complacent
24.Blaming others for my failures
5 things I am greatful for 20/06/2010
1. To be a positive influence amongst my peers
2. To realise that I need some quiet time to myself
3. To wake up knowing I had some decent deep sleep (I was late for work haha)
4. To be able to talk about my personal development with family
5. To have fish n chips for lunch
2. To realise that I need some quiet time to myself
3. To wake up knowing I had some decent deep sleep (I was late for work haha)
4. To be able to talk about my personal development with family
5. To have fish n chips for lunch
Friday, June 18, 2010
Self Image
How do I see myself?
I look at myself in the mirror in the morning and I can't help but smile, flex, dance and sometimes even flirt with myself. I see an incredibly sexy guy who is on this Earth to please women :) I often get complemented on the way I dress and how confident I am and it reinforces what I already believe. But this wasn't always the case. If you have read my post on Attraction you will see I had a very negative perception of myself.
It took me years of more internal change than external change to be where I'm at today. I think learning to understand my value as a person has helped me develop my positive self image. I've always had a great sense of style but no-one has ever commented on my fashion sense until more recently. I've never had a girl call me hot until recently. I've come to realise it's not what you wear but how you wear it.
I still see the quiet skinny Asian kid with the bowl haircut and the funny overbite somedays but in recent times it has done more to motivate me to change myself more than anything. I sometimes find it hard to believe that this sexy bald guy is really me. I wish I could go back in time and talk to my old self and tell him that he would one day be a sexy motherfucker.
I look at myself in the mirror in the morning and I can't help but smile, flex, dance and sometimes even flirt with myself. I see an incredibly sexy guy who is on this Earth to please women :) I often get complemented on the way I dress and how confident I am and it reinforces what I already believe. But this wasn't always the case. If you have read my post on Attraction you will see I had a very negative perception of myself.
It took me years of more internal change than external change to be where I'm at today. I think learning to understand my value as a person has helped me develop my positive self image. I've always had a great sense of style but no-one has ever commented on my fashion sense until more recently. I've never had a girl call me hot until recently. I've come to realise it's not what you wear but how you wear it.
I still see the quiet skinny Asian kid with the bowl haircut and the funny overbite somedays but in recent times it has done more to motivate me to change myself more than anything. I sometimes find it hard to believe that this sexy bald guy is really me. I wish I could go back in time and talk to my old self and tell him that he would one day be a sexy motherfucker.
Confidence
My Strong Points
Energetic
In spite of my issues with sleep appnea, I still operate with enthusiasm and alot of energy. I feel that this really rubs off well on others. Sometimes freak people out. I got a text asking "are you crazy?" after asking a friend to come out when I was on a 8 day, daygame rampage. I feel when people see this it inspires them to extract more out of themselves.
Determined
Coming from a dark past, I have come really far in the past year. I am determined to change my life because if I stop now I will go back to where I once was and it hurts too much to even think about it. I've come to the point where I have associated so much pain to not changing that now I have to change. I only have one shot at life. I have to give it my best shot.
Resilient
I've faced rejection time and time again. When I was hunting for my first full-time job with no work experience, no degree and not alot of self-esteem I had to deal with rejection after rejection for six months. In those six months I had to deal with alot of emotional pain. I felt worthless. I didn't feel like I had any value in society. I was living off Youth Allowance and it sucks. Even with this pain, I kept applying because I had no other option. I needed a job. Everytime I got knocked back I would get back out there and keep going.
I feel my resilience has also helped me in pick-up. After a bad day/night I would be so angry at myself that I was determined to get back out there and smash it the next day/night. There have been times when I would be driving home after having a bad day/night and then drive back because I couldn't end the day on a bad note.
I've been rejected more times in life than I have succeeded and I feel that if I am going to succeed I am going to be rejected even more.
Optimistic
I'm not where I want to be with my life at the moment but I feel that if I put myself out there and continually strive to change, whether big or small, my life will be amazing.
Personal Style
I've always had a great sense of style. I am always getting compliments for my personal style. I feel fashion says alot about my identity. I want people to see someone with a warm and accomodating presence and I feel my dress sense does that.
I also love that I don't feel like I need to spend ridiculous amounts of money for great style. It surprises people when I tell them how much my entire outfits costs.
Unique
My uniqueness is something I've come to embrace alot more in the past year. Growing up I never really fit in because I was seen as abit of an outsider. I never really fit in with the cool kids and I never really fit in with the nerdy kids. I felt the need for acceptance and would resort to conforming. I would dress and act a certain way. As a result of this I felt alot of resistance because I wasn't being myself. There was a fear of allowing myself to be myself because I had fallen too deep in this fake identity, what would people think of me? More and more I am giving myself the permission to be my true self and I feel people are embracing me more than when I was conforming. Why would you want to conform anyway? You'll just be bland and boring like everyone else.
Things I Want to Improve
Building a lifestyle which aligns with my core values and beliefs
Something that I have been working on recently with the help of Matt. Understanding what my values are and living my life in alignment with these values:
- Helping others
- Inspiring
- Influential
- Personal development
- Excitement
- Fun
I feel that being part of All Stars has allowed me to follow these values. I am actively going out with other all stars, relating my experiences with theirs to influence and inspire them. I am taking action towards improving myself and it's fun and exciting. I am also active in the Melbourne Lair for this reason.
It was one of the main reasons why I switched from taekwondo to BJJ. I felt taekwondo was robotic and I felt the instructors were fueled by ego. I felt that the instructors were trying to come off as the be all and end all when it came to teaching and I felt that many students were being given an unrealistic view on reality when it came to self defence. Though personally I don't believe BJJ would be useful in a self defence situation, I love that everyone I've trained with, whether senior or below you, is helping you to become better. There are no egos. Respect is earned through the hard work you put in. Not your rank.
I can feel what it's like to not operate in alignment with my values. At work I am uninspired, unmotivated and going to work seems like a buzz kill. I am actively seeking a new job which will hopefully align with my values and give me the juice I need. Also being around people who don't align with these core values really sucks your energy.
I have come to see that when you are operating within your core values and beliefs, everything seems to operate in a flow zone. I am actively looking to improve this area of my life as I feel that this is where building an amazing life starts.
Embracing my sexuality
This is a big issue for alot of guys who get into pick-up and I'm no different. At a young age I didn't get to express ourselves sexually and now I'm playing catchup. At the moment I am reading alot of books on sexuality and I have been mixing up night game abit more as I am alot more sexual in my interactions at night than I am during the day. I still feel I can do more to develop this part of me. I haven't been journaling much on my daygame or nightgame adventures recently. I think it's time to start doing it again.
Energetic
In spite of my issues with sleep appnea, I still operate with enthusiasm and alot of energy. I feel that this really rubs off well on others. Sometimes freak people out. I got a text asking "are you crazy?" after asking a friend to come out when I was on a 8 day, daygame rampage. I feel when people see this it inspires them to extract more out of themselves.
Determined
Coming from a dark past, I have come really far in the past year. I am determined to change my life because if I stop now I will go back to where I once was and it hurts too much to even think about it. I've come to the point where I have associated so much pain to not changing that now I have to change. I only have one shot at life. I have to give it my best shot.
Resilient
I've faced rejection time and time again. When I was hunting for my first full-time job with no work experience, no degree and not alot of self-esteem I had to deal with rejection after rejection for six months. In those six months I had to deal with alot of emotional pain. I felt worthless. I didn't feel like I had any value in society. I was living off Youth Allowance and it sucks. Even with this pain, I kept applying because I had no other option. I needed a job. Everytime I got knocked back I would get back out there and keep going.
I feel my resilience has also helped me in pick-up. After a bad day/night I would be so angry at myself that I was determined to get back out there and smash it the next day/night. There have been times when I would be driving home after having a bad day/night and then drive back because I couldn't end the day on a bad note.
I've been rejected more times in life than I have succeeded and I feel that if I am going to succeed I am going to be rejected even more.
Optimistic
I'm not where I want to be with my life at the moment but I feel that if I put myself out there and continually strive to change, whether big or small, my life will be amazing.
Personal Style
I've always had a great sense of style. I am always getting compliments for my personal style. I feel fashion says alot about my identity. I want people to see someone with a warm and accomodating presence and I feel my dress sense does that.
I also love that I don't feel like I need to spend ridiculous amounts of money for great style. It surprises people when I tell them how much my entire outfits costs.
Unique
My uniqueness is something I've come to embrace alot more in the past year. Growing up I never really fit in because I was seen as abit of an outsider. I never really fit in with the cool kids and I never really fit in with the nerdy kids. I felt the need for acceptance and would resort to conforming. I would dress and act a certain way. As a result of this I felt alot of resistance because I wasn't being myself. There was a fear of allowing myself to be myself because I had fallen too deep in this fake identity, what would people think of me? More and more I am giving myself the permission to be my true self and I feel people are embracing me more than when I was conforming. Why would you want to conform anyway? You'll just be bland and boring like everyone else.
Things I Want to Improve
Building a lifestyle which aligns with my core values and beliefs
Something that I have been working on recently with the help of Matt. Understanding what my values are and living my life in alignment with these values:
- Helping others
- Inspiring
- Influential
- Personal development
- Excitement
- Fun
I feel that being part of All Stars has allowed me to follow these values. I am actively going out with other all stars, relating my experiences with theirs to influence and inspire them. I am taking action towards improving myself and it's fun and exciting. I am also active in the Melbourne Lair for this reason.
It was one of the main reasons why I switched from taekwondo to BJJ. I felt taekwondo was robotic and I felt the instructors were fueled by ego. I felt that the instructors were trying to come off as the be all and end all when it came to teaching and I felt that many students were being given an unrealistic view on reality when it came to self defence. Though personally I don't believe BJJ would be useful in a self defence situation, I love that everyone I've trained with, whether senior or below you, is helping you to become better. There are no egos. Respect is earned through the hard work you put in. Not your rank.
I can feel what it's like to not operate in alignment with my values. At work I am uninspired, unmotivated and going to work seems like a buzz kill. I am actively seeking a new job which will hopefully align with my values and give me the juice I need. Also being around people who don't align with these core values really sucks your energy.
I have come to see that when you are operating within your core values and beliefs, everything seems to operate in a flow zone. I am actively looking to improve this area of my life as I feel that this is where building an amazing life starts.
Embracing my sexuality
This is a big issue for alot of guys who get into pick-up and I'm no different. At a young age I didn't get to express ourselves sexually and now I'm playing catchup. At the moment I am reading alot of books on sexuality and I have been mixing up night game abit more as I am alot more sexual in my interactions at night than I am during the day. I still feel I can do more to develop this part of me. I haven't been journaling much on my daygame or nightgame adventures recently. I think it's time to start doing it again.
5 things I am greatful for 19/06/2010
1. My health
2. My family and friends
3. My life experiences
4. My quest for continued life experiences
5. To enjoy healthy food like fish n chips :)
2. My family and friends
3. My life experiences
4. My quest for continued life experiences
5. To enjoy healthy food like fish n chips :)
What am I greatful for? 18/06/2010
1. The love of my family
2. To have people feel like I am their source of strength
3. To be inspired by those who are achieving their dreams
4. To be alive and well
5. To have the choice to be happy
2. To have people feel like I am their source of strength
3. To be inspired by those who are achieving their dreams
4. To be alive and well
5. To have the choice to be happy
Thursday, June 17, 2010
What Motivates Me?
Right now I am sick of going to work. I'm unmotivated, uninspired and I struggle to get the best of of myself on a regular basis. I am in an environment which doesn't encourage growth and I just feel like I am going through the motions. The positive side of it is that I know that this is the case and it can be changed. As I now know what doesn't motivate me, I can now look at what does.
Challenge
I love a job that is challenging. I guess this is what brought me to my current job in the first place. Because it was a specialised role, I was learning all the time, it was fasted paced and there was so many things to think about on the go. There was a rush doing what I did. Now that I have a greater understanding and have a handle on what to expect, it no longer challenges me.
Competition
I am a competitive person. I grew up playing competing in tennis tournaments. I loved it. The feeling of imposing myself over my oponent. You against them. It was such a rush when you and another guy were just going at each other. I miss that feeling. I am yet to come across a job which makes me feel that way. It is a reason why I quit and given up an opportunity to get a black belt in taekwondo and returned to BJJ. It's an opportunity to compete while getting myself fit as well as developing myself physically, mentally and spiritually.
Being around inspiring people
I have a fascination for documentaries and biographies. Seeing how successful people have come from humble beginnings to greatness. It demonstrates that there is hope. It's also great to be part of All-Stars as well as part of the Melbourne Lair. To be part of a community where there are guys and girls from all walks of life dedicated to building an amazing lifestyle for themselves really is inspiring to me. Especially when I get to sit down with someone and hear their story. My workplace mainly consists of people who have worked for the bank for ages and seems like they are there to collect long service leave. They are just going through the motions. You can see some of these guys are miserable and it really sucks alot out of me.
Growth
My job no longer offers room for growth. I have come as far as I have and feel I have no room to grow. Currently I am limited in my technical ability but I have alot to offer intrinsically. I have invested alot of time and money to develop my social skills as well as develop my leadership skills. I want to find a job which will allow me to put these skills to use.
Purpose
In the past I was someone who thrived under pressure. I feel that now that when the pressure is on I won't exert myself as I don't feel I'll get anything out of it. I have gone on the grind for years and not seen myself get anywhere at work. I look around and see my work mates not pull their weight and yet they get the same pay and same bonus as me. I figure why should I put myself through all this?
Excitement
Something I have been missing for a while and I am taking action to change that. I feel like if I am having fun then when obstacles come my way I'll handle it much easier compared to if I'm unmotivated and uninspired. It is a great feeling knowing you are working towards something.
Sex
I think alot of actions all of us have taken have been in the effort to have rough animalistic sex. I've spent money on a BMW, a stylish wardrobe, pick-up related courses, speed dating, being the nice guy, being the jerk, etc...
If you don't agree then I don't believe you are truly being honest with yourself :)
Acceptance
I think when you grow up a loner as I have you feel this incredible desire to be needed or wanted. It's still something that motivates me to this day. It's the reason why I got into pick-up. It's the reason why I got into All Stars. When people die I think about the legacy they have left behind. Did they make an impact on the lives of others? Or did they just waste away from existence? I fear that if I were to die tomorrow that no-one would know and I wouldn't be surprised if people didn't rock up to my funeral. It's this fear which drives me.
I am glad I hate my job. It has helped me re-evaluate what is important to me and what I value. I feel the actions I am taking now are in becoming more in-line with what I value. I think when I am acting within my values and my beliefs, everything seems to flow naturally.
5 Things I am greatful for 17/06/2010
1. To be healthy and alive
2. To have people around me to support me
3. To be looking for new place
4. To have good things to look forward to
5. To have a place where I can be open about anything and everything without judgement
2. To have people around me to support me
3. To be looking for new place
4. To have good things to look forward to
5. To have a place where I can be open about anything and everything without judgement
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
10 people I admire
1. Michael Jordan
I admire Michael Jordan because of his resilience and his desire to succeed. He is an amazing leader who inspires his teammates to win. I also like that he has a warm presence and has a positive influence on peoples lives.
2. Bruce Lee
I admire Bruce Lee for his transcendence of martial arts. During his time martial arts were only limited to people of Asian background. Bruce Lee opened martial arts to the western world. He also went against traditional masters and pursued different styles believing that what would work for one person may not work for another. Taking what works and throwing away what doesn't. A true pioneer. Like myself he wasn't accepted amongst the Asian community for not being "Asian". I admire his as he was able to transcended barriers of race, religion, tradition, culture.
3. Andre Agassi
I love his intensity. Agassi changed the way tennis was played. Hitting one in a million shots consistently. You can see that his stlye is a major influence on the players of today. He was a massive influence on me when I played tennis when I was younger. My dynamic style of play was inspired by him. I also love his intensity and resilience.
4. My Dad
My dad has had to deal with alot. Captured and held prisioner for 6 years by the communists after the Vietnam War. He survived and travelled to Australia to build a better life for us. He returned to school and went to university until he got sick.
I admire my dad for his stubborn resilience. He is warm and caring and I sometimes take it for granted.
5. Richard Branson
As a dyslexic and being told he would never succeed. He used his strengths, his ability to connect with people, to build a multi-billion dollar empire. He is successful in spite of those who told him he would never be. I also admire that even with all his success, he is very personable and giving.
6. Roger Federer
I admire him for his dominant yet warm and honest presence. So strong that his opponents are actually happy to lose to him. I feel a true man is able to kill yet be warm and humble at the same time.
7. Kobe Bryant
Like Michael Jordan, he has this amazing intensity when the plays basketball and shares the same qualities that Jordan has only he does it differently. Kobe seems to be alot more smoother in how he projects himself.
8. Wanderlei Silva
I admire Wanderlei Silva because he fights with his heart. There may be technically better fighters out there but you know when this guy fights he is putting himself out there with no fear of whether he is going to win or lose. This is a trait I am trying to develop for myself. To be able to express myself without fear taking over me.
9. Michael Jackson
A pioneer. His style has influenced my dancing in a big way. When he performs you know he is coming from the heart. He inspires others to achieve their dreams.
10.Tupac Shakur
His lyrics hit me on a deep level. When he is rapping he is coming from the heart. I haven't listened to any of his music recently. I think I'll pull some tracks out tonight.
A common theme amongts these people are that they are expressive in what they do, they are hard working and they feel a duty to influence the lives of others. I'd like to leave this Earth and be remembered for possessing these traits.
I admire Michael Jordan because of his resilience and his desire to succeed. He is an amazing leader who inspires his teammates to win. I also like that he has a warm presence and has a positive influence on peoples lives.
2. Bruce Lee
I admire Bruce Lee for his transcendence of martial arts. During his time martial arts were only limited to people of Asian background. Bruce Lee opened martial arts to the western world. He also went against traditional masters and pursued different styles believing that what would work for one person may not work for another. Taking what works and throwing away what doesn't. A true pioneer. Like myself he wasn't accepted amongst the Asian community for not being "Asian". I admire his as he was able to transcended barriers of race, religion, tradition, culture.
3. Andre Agassi
I love his intensity. Agassi changed the way tennis was played. Hitting one in a million shots consistently. You can see that his stlye is a major influence on the players of today. He was a massive influence on me when I played tennis when I was younger. My dynamic style of play was inspired by him. I also love his intensity and resilience.
4. My Dad
My dad has had to deal with alot. Captured and held prisioner for 6 years by the communists after the Vietnam War. He survived and travelled to Australia to build a better life for us. He returned to school and went to university until he got sick.
I admire my dad for his stubborn resilience. He is warm and caring and I sometimes take it for granted.
5. Richard Branson
As a dyslexic and being told he would never succeed. He used his strengths, his ability to connect with people, to build a multi-billion dollar empire. He is successful in spite of those who told him he would never be. I also admire that even with all his success, he is very personable and giving.
6. Roger Federer
I admire him for his dominant yet warm and honest presence. So strong that his opponents are actually happy to lose to him. I feel a true man is able to kill yet be warm and humble at the same time.
7. Kobe Bryant
Like Michael Jordan, he has this amazing intensity when the plays basketball and shares the same qualities that Jordan has only he does it differently. Kobe seems to be alot more smoother in how he projects himself.
8. Wanderlei Silva
I admire Wanderlei Silva because he fights with his heart. There may be technically better fighters out there but you know when this guy fights he is putting himself out there with no fear of whether he is going to win or lose. This is a trait I am trying to develop for myself. To be able to express myself without fear taking over me.
9. Michael Jackson
A pioneer. His style has influenced my dancing in a big way. When he performs you know he is coming from the heart. He inspires others to achieve their dreams.
10.Tupac Shakur
His lyrics hit me on a deep level. When he is rapping he is coming from the heart. I haven't listened to any of his music recently. I think I'll pull some tracks out tonight.
A common theme amongts these people are that they are expressive in what they do, they are hard working and they feel a duty to influence the lives of others. I'd like to leave this Earth and be remembered for possessing these traits.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
5 Things I am greatful for 16/06/2010
1. To be alive and well
2. To have a roof over my head
3. To have a support group of people around me
4. To have the opportunity to make my life better
5. To feel warm on a cold day
2. To have a roof over my head
3. To have a support group of people around me
4. To have the opportunity to make my life better
5. To feel warm on a cold day
All Stars Carla - Scores Breakdown
I aiming for a top 10 score and missed out again. On a positive note I made a personal best score. This week I'm going to try plan my missions for the next two weeks. I think it will be more achievable if I can see where my points will be coming from rather than doing missions as I go along. Actions marked in bold have been completed.
15/06/2010
350 - Quizes
50 - Movie of the week
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - BJJ
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym
20 - Action towards my goal - Watched Sex Secrets TV show
Total: 480
16/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Cardio
100 - Personal Foundation program - Make a list of 10 people you admire: identify the qualities, natural behaviour and how they handle tough situations and people. What standards could you raise that would have you be more like them, yet still fit you today?
20 - Applied for jobs
20 - Action towards my goal - House hunting
17/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Chest and Biceps
20 - Action towards my goal - Researched shares
20 - Action towards my goal - Day Game
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
20 - Speak to another all star - Flowz
100 - Extreme Self-Care Program - I know what motivates me
18/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - Applied for jobs
19/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
70 - Post on confidence
35 - Post on self-image
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
Total:1085
20/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
21/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Legs and abs
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - Applied for jobs
20 - Spoke to another all-star - Sammy
20 - Action towards my goal - Daygame
22/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Back and triceps
20 - Action towards my goal - BJJ
20 - Action towards my goal - Daygame
20 - Action towards my goal - Job hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - House hunting
20 - Spoke to another all-star - Sammy
23/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Daygame
20 - Action towards my goal - Job hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - House hunting
24/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Night Game
20 - Action towards my goal - Day Game
20 - Action towards my goal - Applied for jobs
25/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Night Game
26/06/2010
20 - Action towards my goal - Speed Dating
20 - Action towards my goal - Night of Mayhem
27/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
600 - Listened to the audio - Social Intelligence
100 - Never use the word "approach" again. I now use breaking some hearts
50 - Personal Weekly Wins
50 - Weekly Update Sheet
Total: 2445
15/06/2010
350 - Quizes
50 - Movie of the week
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - BJJ
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym
20 - Action towards my goal - Watched Sex Secrets TV show
Total: 480
16/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Cardio
100 - Personal Foundation program - Make a list of 10 people you admire: identify the qualities, natural behaviour and how they handle tough situations and people. What standards could you raise that would have you be more like them, yet still fit you today?
20 - Applied for jobs
20 - Action towards my goal - House hunting
17/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Chest and Biceps
20 - Action towards my goal - Researched shares
20 - Action towards my goal - Day Game
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
20 - Speak to another all star - Flowz
100 - Extreme Self-Care Program - I know what motivates me
18/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - Applied for jobs
19/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
70 - Post on confidence
35 - Post on self-image
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
Total:1085
20/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
21/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Legs and abs
20 - Action towards my goal - House Hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - Applied for jobs
20 - Spoke to another all-star - Sammy
20 - Action towards my goal - Daygame
22/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Went to the gym - Back and triceps
20 - Action towards my goal - BJJ
20 - Action towards my goal - Daygame
20 - Action towards my goal - Job hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - House hunting
20 - Spoke to another all-star - Sammy
23/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Daygame
20 - Action towards my goal - Job hunting
20 - Action towards my goal - House hunting
24/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Night Game
20 - Action towards my goal - Day Game
20 - Action towards my goal - Applied for jobs
25/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
20 - Action towards my goal - Night Game
26/06/2010
20 - Action towards my goal - Speed Dating
20 - Action towards my goal - Night of Mayhem
27/06/2010
20 - 5 Things I am greatful for
600 - Listened to the audio - Social Intelligence
100 - Never use the word "approach" again. I now use breaking some hearts
50 - Personal Weekly Wins
50 - Weekly Update Sheet
Total: 2445
5 Things I am greatful for 15/06/2010
I know All-Stars Angola is over but I wanted to continue this.
1. My critics for the giving me the desire to succeed
2. That burning feeling in your chest after an intense workout
3. Time to rest
4. To have an avenue to express myself without fear of judgement
5. To be alive and well
1. My critics for the giving me the desire to succeed
2. That burning feeling in your chest after an intense workout
3. Time to rest
4. To have an avenue to express myself without fear of judgement
5. To be alive and well
Something to be positive about
I feel like alot of my posts recently have been very negative so I thought I start posting things to feel positive about. I figure I'll start with a list. Not sure if I get bonus points for this but here goes:
- That burning feeling I get when I have an intense workout
- Smashing it at the gym this afternoon
- Crazy experiences to talk to people about
- Exploring my creativity
- Going to Salsa tomorrow
- Meeting with like minded guys wanting to change their lives
- Going for a new job
- Knowing I have people to prove wrong
- BJJ is awesome. The adrenaline of fighting in a safe environment with minimal resistance. The feeling of needing to survive. It's something I've been missing for a while.
- The emotional journey I go on when I listen to trance music. The feeling of escapism
- Meeting with people I haven't seen in a while
- Being complimented on my dress sense. I haven't done much to my wardrobe. I've added a few accessories.
- That burning feeling I get when I have an intense workout
- Smashing it at the gym this afternoon
- Crazy experiences to talk to people about
- Exploring my creativity
- Going to Salsa tomorrow
- Meeting with like minded guys wanting to change their lives
- Going for a new job
- Knowing I have people to prove wrong
- BJJ is awesome. The adrenaline of fighting in a safe environment with minimal resistance. The feeling of needing to survive. It's something I've been missing for a while.
- The emotional journey I go on when I listen to trance music. The feeling of escapism
- Meeting with people I haven't seen in a while
- Being complimented on my dress sense. I haven't done much to my wardrobe. I've added a few accessories.
It's statement like these which are holding me back...
I've just finished BJJ and as I'm getting changed I get the following message from my sister:
"Hi, i advise u 2 stay where u r & work ur way up. Consult's hard work. Think carefully. Oanh"
I was reading this and I got abit angry and I was quick to reply:
"when you are miserable, unninspired, unmotivated something needs to change i've felt this way for a very long time. i value my wellbeing much more than the money i make."
I love my sister alot and we are very close but when I hear something like this I can't help but get angry. It's statements like these that have held me back in the past. It was statement like these which stopped me from even trying. It was statements like these which shut me off from the rest of the world. To accept that I was destined to live a life where I was being told what to do. To feel guilty about wanting treat myself for my hard work and wanting to enjoy my success.
Growing up in a fairly traditional Asian family the culture tends to reflect the communual mentality where everyone works to help the family whereas in Australia it is more of a individualist mentality. Being the oldest son there is an expectation to support the family. Growing up poor I really hated this. Why should I have to work so hard and give up part of my pay to family. Not that I don't want to help them out but I have put in the time so it should be up to me to determine how I should spend my money.
I remember getting my first fulltime job and when I first told my family already they were talking about how much I should give up to them. It took 6 months of heartache to get my first job and it really took the joy out of my achievement. Not having money when growing up I had many things I wanted to buy. I needed braces because my teeth were mangled. I needed to sharpen up the way I dress to goto work. I needed a car to get around. My family would make me feel guilty for wanting these things.
As I was going through the pain of being rejected by employer after employer my mum told me "working is hard. Focus on your studies." My marks were terrible and no employer was willing to accept me based on marks alone. I knew I had the desire and the drive to work but being unspirited by statements like always put a sense of guilt in the back of my head. Feeling like I was disrespecting my parents if I didn't do as I was told.
When it comes to girls my parents would say find a nice Asian girl so she can look after you. I have dated a few Asian girls and they have failed miserably. My values just don't align with traditional Asian girls. I find them bland and extremely boring. I feel I am a person who craves a connection and I never got that with an Asian girl. It seems they were with me because I was the first one they could settle for...or was it the other way around? My sister would say don't date go from girl to girl. I should stick around. Relationships are hard work. I can't accept that. If it was real love, it wouldn't be work and I shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to play the field while I search for the woman of my dreams.
It's the feeding off these words from family which have held me back and hasn't served me. I know deep down that I can't accept life as it is. It hurts too much. My mum tells me to get used to it and learn to be happy. I can't be happy when I know there is a greater world for me out there. It has been very hard for me to let go of my family. I have made it clear for them I will be moving out soon. As much as I know it will hurt them. I know it is something I have to do. I associate alot of negativity being with my family. I feel that to become the man I want to be I have to do it on my own terms.
"Hi, i advise u 2 stay where u r & work ur way up. Consult's hard work. Think carefully. Oanh"
I was reading this and I got abit angry and I was quick to reply:
"when you are miserable, unninspired, unmotivated something needs to change i've felt this way for a very long time. i value my wellbeing much more than the money i make."
I love my sister alot and we are very close but when I hear something like this I can't help but get angry. It's statements like these that have held me back in the past. It was statement like these which stopped me from even trying. It was statements like these which shut me off from the rest of the world. To accept that I was destined to live a life where I was being told what to do. To feel guilty about wanting treat myself for my hard work and wanting to enjoy my success.
Growing up in a fairly traditional Asian family the culture tends to reflect the communual mentality where everyone works to help the family whereas in Australia it is more of a individualist mentality. Being the oldest son there is an expectation to support the family. Growing up poor I really hated this. Why should I have to work so hard and give up part of my pay to family. Not that I don't want to help them out but I have put in the time so it should be up to me to determine how I should spend my money.
I remember getting my first fulltime job and when I first told my family already they were talking about how much I should give up to them. It took 6 months of heartache to get my first job and it really took the joy out of my achievement. Not having money when growing up I had many things I wanted to buy. I needed braces because my teeth were mangled. I needed to sharpen up the way I dress to goto work. I needed a car to get around. My family would make me feel guilty for wanting these things.
As I was going through the pain of being rejected by employer after employer my mum told me "working is hard. Focus on your studies." My marks were terrible and no employer was willing to accept me based on marks alone. I knew I had the desire and the drive to work but being unspirited by statements like always put a sense of guilt in the back of my head. Feeling like I was disrespecting my parents if I didn't do as I was told.
When it comes to girls my parents would say find a nice Asian girl so she can look after you. I have dated a few Asian girls and they have failed miserably. My values just don't align with traditional Asian girls. I find them bland and extremely boring. I feel I am a person who craves a connection and I never got that with an Asian girl. It seems they were with me because I was the first one they could settle for...or was it the other way around? My sister would say don't date go from girl to girl. I should stick around. Relationships are hard work. I can't accept that. If it was real love, it wouldn't be work and I shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to play the field while I search for the woman of my dreams.
It's the feeding off these words from family which have held me back and hasn't served me. I know deep down that I can't accept life as it is. It hurts too much. My mum tells me to get used to it and learn to be happy. I can't be happy when I know there is a greater world for me out there. It has been very hard for me to let go of my family. I have made it clear for them I will be moving out soon. As much as I know it will hurt them. I know it is something I have to do. I associate alot of negativity being with my family. I feel that to become the man I want to be I have to do it on my own terms.
Monday, June 14, 2010
How am I feeling today?
15/06/2010
Right now I feel like I haven't had enough sleep. I am lying in bed as I type this and I am incredibly tired. I went to Winter Sound System and popped some pills. It's been 6 months since I last took any kind of drugs. The last few days I have really burnt myself out with work, daygame, BJJ, Salsa. I just haven't had any time to recharge my batteries. I felt abit run down and I needed some kind of escape.
I only decided to goto Winter Sound System very last minute. Again I was really tired fro the past week and I needed some rest. I get a call from my mate on Sunday night. I wasn't too keen on going. Sure the there was a great lineup but I was just too tired. I had been trying to catchup on some sleep all afternoon but couldn't fall asleep. So I thought "Fuck it!" Funny how my logic works when I'm tired.
I meet up with my mate and he offers some pills but I decline. As we drive up we're talking about what we have been up to and how much we were looking forward to the night. I'm thinking to myself I don't know how I'm gonna survive. I also think to myself "it's been a rough couple of days. I need some form of escape."
I ask my mate to get me 3. I thought it should be enough to get me through the night. He calls the person he's getting the pills from and gets 3 more. We arrive at Melbourne park and we hit main stage. I can't remember who the DJ was but I was rocking it on the dancefloor. I felt abit of a jolt. I thought this was me getting into it. Maybe I wasn't really tired. Maybe I just needed to be somewhere where I was having fun.
I rocked it for a bit on the mainstage before deciding to head to the trance stage. Nothing gets me pumped up more than trance music. The highs and lows, how it starts slow and is banging at the end. Trance music moves me in ways alot of people don't understand. After abit of dancing I decide to flip my first pill. I can feel it abit but there's not much of a buzz (there's shit pills out there these days compared to when I was taking them week-in week-out). So I gave it an hour before I took another one. Nothing. Another hour late I flip the third and still nothing. I am spent so I decide to sit down and close my eyes for a bit.
I sat in the chair for about 20 minutes. I think I had abit of a cat nap and I was beginning to feel the pills abit. I was having weird hallucinations of architecture. Seeing apartment complexes and there was this one moment where I saw a run down house with a weedy garden and then see it turn to something amazing and beautiful. I don't know what that was all about.
Anyway I wake up and I am feeling refreshed and suddenly I am starting to feel the effect of the pills. It was kind of a delayed effect. It was like the pills enhanced my effect of tiredness and waking up refreshed from my cat nap re-energised my and enhanced that state I was in. I hit the dancefloor rocking it with amazing feeling of energy. I was having fun, I was talking to people, I was rocking it to the music...it was amazing. I wouldn't say I felt like god but I wasn't far from it.
By the end of it, I had come down and I was back to feeling exhausted again. Right now I feel abit de-motivated. I know there are things I should be doing but I can't be bothered. I guess there's no excuses. I made the decision to take the pills. I knew what the consequences were and now I am paying the price for it. Right now as I am typing this I am being given this jolt to get my shit together. I have layed in bed all day and have done nothing. I'm gonna stop typing right now and hit the gym, then BJJ after.
Right now I feel like I haven't had enough sleep. I am lying in bed as I type this and I am incredibly tired. I went to Winter Sound System and popped some pills. It's been 6 months since I last took any kind of drugs. The last few days I have really burnt myself out with work, daygame, BJJ, Salsa. I just haven't had any time to recharge my batteries. I felt abit run down and I needed some kind of escape.
I only decided to goto Winter Sound System very last minute. Again I was really tired fro the past week and I needed some rest. I get a call from my mate on Sunday night. I wasn't too keen on going. Sure the there was a great lineup but I was just too tired. I had been trying to catchup on some sleep all afternoon but couldn't fall asleep. So I thought "Fuck it!" Funny how my logic works when I'm tired.
I meet up with my mate and he offers some pills but I decline. As we drive up we're talking about what we have been up to and how much we were looking forward to the night. I'm thinking to myself I don't know how I'm gonna survive. I also think to myself "it's been a rough couple of days. I need some form of escape."
I ask my mate to get me 3. I thought it should be enough to get me through the night. He calls the person he's getting the pills from and gets 3 more. We arrive at Melbourne park and we hit main stage. I can't remember who the DJ was but I was rocking it on the dancefloor. I felt abit of a jolt. I thought this was me getting into it. Maybe I wasn't really tired. Maybe I just needed to be somewhere where I was having fun.
I rocked it for a bit on the mainstage before deciding to head to the trance stage. Nothing gets me pumped up more than trance music. The highs and lows, how it starts slow and is banging at the end. Trance music moves me in ways alot of people don't understand. After abit of dancing I decide to flip my first pill. I can feel it abit but there's not much of a buzz (there's shit pills out there these days compared to when I was taking them week-in week-out). So I gave it an hour before I took another one. Nothing. Another hour late I flip the third and still nothing. I am spent so I decide to sit down and close my eyes for a bit.
I sat in the chair for about 20 minutes. I think I had abit of a cat nap and I was beginning to feel the pills abit. I was having weird hallucinations of architecture. Seeing apartment complexes and there was this one moment where I saw a run down house with a weedy garden and then see it turn to something amazing and beautiful. I don't know what that was all about.
Anyway I wake up and I am feeling refreshed and suddenly I am starting to feel the effect of the pills. It was kind of a delayed effect. It was like the pills enhanced my effect of tiredness and waking up refreshed from my cat nap re-energised my and enhanced that state I was in. I hit the dancefloor rocking it with amazing feeling of energy. I was having fun, I was talking to people, I was rocking it to the music...it was amazing. I wouldn't say I felt like god but I wasn't far from it.
By the end of it, I had come down and I was back to feeling exhausted again. Right now I feel abit de-motivated. I know there are things I should be doing but I can't be bothered. I guess there's no excuses. I made the decision to take the pills. I knew what the consequences were and now I am paying the price for it. Right now as I am typing this I am being given this jolt to get my shit together. I have layed in bed all day and have done nothing. I'm gonna stop typing right now and hit the gym, then BJJ after.
Attractive tests
http://www.gotoquiz.com/how_attractive_are_you_really
http://quizfarm.com/quizzes/Sex/oldmanriver/are-you-attractive-to-the-opposite-sex/
http://www.youthink.com/quiz.cfm?obj_id=136930
http://www.boredquiz.com/personality_quiz/what-makes-you-attractive-quiz/1
You are ....
Result: Beautiful/handsome
Well, well, what more can we say. The truth is you are too pretty and people can't resist looking at you. They are attracted with your looks and charm. You are so yummy and hot.
http://www.datingfast.com/quiz/Index-4men.asp
Congratulations! You've passed the quiz with a score of 33%.
Your answers indicate that you are friendly and open person who just needs more social contacts. If you have any outgoing friends, see if they can help you get into situations where you have to speak to a girl. It may be terrifying, but it can help.
Hold your chin up and continue to be active in your pursuits and you will eventually find what you are looking for. I think the biggest skill you have is you listen. Listen to others but also to yourself.
Just try a normal conversation with casual acquaintances. Talk about classes, current events, anything. Debate if you want. So to experience success in dating woman, you need to keep trying and you'll improve your skills over time. If you read a few books I'm touting here, I'm sure you'll makeover in no time.
My thoughts
I believe I am an attractive guy. I just have trouble showing that when I am interacting with women. I feel women can only determine how attracted they are to me by the first interaction and alot of the time it doesn't shine through. I feel with more solid interactions with women I will be able to get this handled.
You are 29% attractive
Don't feel too good about yourself. You have no room to bark. You're just one step beyond the kennel and chances are that you slipped the leash. Go back for more kibble and less 'tude.
How attractive are you...really?
Take More Quizzes
http://quizfarm.com/quizzes/Sex/oldmanriver/are-you-attractive-to-the-opposite-sex/
http://www.youthink.com/quiz.cfm?obj_id=136930
| Are You Attractive?! Moderately Attractive You could probably get a date, but its more of a fifty/ fifty outcome. You're OK in crowds, and some women (or men) would definitely find you attractive! |
| Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests. |
http://www.boredquiz.com/personality_quiz/what-makes-you-attractive-quiz/1
You are ....
Result: Beautiful/handsome
Well, well, what more can we say. The truth is you are too pretty and people can't resist looking at you. They are attracted with your looks and charm. You are so yummy and hot.
http://www.datingfast.com/quiz/Index-4men.asp
Congratulations! You've passed the quiz with a score of 33%.
Your answers indicate that you are friendly and open person who just needs more social contacts. If you have any outgoing friends, see if they can help you get into situations where you have to speak to a girl. It may be terrifying, but it can help.
Hold your chin up and continue to be active in your pursuits and you will eventually find what you are looking for. I think the biggest skill you have is you listen. Listen to others but also to yourself.
Just try a normal conversation with casual acquaintances. Talk about classes, current events, anything. Debate if you want. So to experience success in dating woman, you need to keep trying and you'll improve your skills over time. If you read a few books I'm touting here, I'm sure you'll makeover in no time.
My thoughts
I believe I am an attractive guy. I just have trouble showing that when I am interacting with women. I feel women can only determine how attracted they are to me by the first interaction and alot of the time it doesn't shine through. I feel with more solid interactions with women I will be able to get this handled.
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